Wonkette's Top Ten Stories Of The Week ... Wish You A Happy Benjamin Harrison Day?
Today (according to some random site on the internet that tells you what holiday it is) is Benjamin Harrison Day! Like the guy who was president one time and, uh, also married his niece. I'm sorry, but that is literally the only thing I can tell you about Benjamin Harrison and frankly I do not remember how I know it in the first place. Maybe it was in a movie or something? I'm also not sure why they picked today, given that his birthday was in August, but whatever.
Anyway, I couldn't think of anything else for top ten content today, so I guess we can all just learn about Benjamin Harrison! Apparently he was also in favor of letting Black people vote and opposed the Chinese Exclusion Act, so that's nice.
Benjamin Harrison: The Forgotten Presidentwww.youtube.com
And here are your top ten stories of the week!
10. Angela Davis Descended From Mayflower Colonizers Isn't 'Gotcha!' Some Idiots Seem To Think
9. Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, The Piña Colada!
8. Wonkette Movie Night: 9 To 5
7. Dilbert Guy Explains He Is Just Doing The Mike Pence Rule, But With Black People
6. Very Serious Full Of Sh*t Liar Harris Faulkner Can Not BELIEVE Joe Biden Laughing At Dead Fentanyl Victims!
5. Marjorie Taylor Greene's Secession Sequel
4. Florida State Senator Wants To 'Cancel' The Democratic Party, Like They Need His Help
3. This Year's CPAC Doesn't Sound Like Very Schlappin' Good Time To Us
2. Nebraska Dem Just Gonna Filibuster Eeeeeeeeverything
1. Having F*cked Around, Dildo Guy Scott Adams Finds Out. Hard.
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Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse