Wonkette Week In Review: All The Best Of Your Terrible Week
It's been one hell of a week, and we bet your weekend would be greatly enhanced by catching up on some of Yr. Wonkette's top stories that you may have missed while "working" or lost in a post-election drunken stupor (some of you may still be in one of those, and we don't blame you!). So here are our ten most-shared stories from the Facebook. Don't see your personal favorite here? Next week, click harder. Share your favorites: You'll take a stand for excellence in snark, outrage your rightwing uncle, and help us get beautiful, beautiful pageviews. And so, our weekly Top Ten!
10: Peggy Noonan remembered how graciously people in Olden Tymes accepted being quarantined, not like today's uppity Ebola nurses with their "rights" and their "medical knowing stuff."
9: On Election day, we dreamed of a tied Senate and a nigh-omnipotent Old Handsome Joe Biden. Those were such heady, hope-filled days, back on Tuesday.
8: The day after the Great Republicanning, Democrats were talking about maybe acting like Democrats for a change, and the ghost of Will Rogers smiled as everyone remembed his line about not belonging to any organized political party.
7: Scott Brown became the first man ever to lose two Senate elections to women, and we reminded him of that t-shirt we like: "Don't think of it as losing to a girl. Just think of it as losing."
6: A mentally unstable man in Oklahoma tried to behead a guy who he thought was a witch, and nobody seemed to think it meant all Christians are murderous thugs.
5: Mitch McConnell would like to be Senate Majority Leader, and who knows, maybe Ted Cruz will let him do that.
4: James Lankford is Oklahoma's new senator, and Yr Editrix knows just how terrible he will be.
3: With the reelections of Pat Roberts, Sam Brownback, and Kris Kobach, we found ourselves asking once again, "What's the matter with Kansas?"
2: Mitch McConnell and John Boehner wrote an op-ed piece with lots of new ideas, like repealing Obamacare, killing Obamacare, and drowning Obamacare in a bathtub. And immigration reform, which will come out of committee as an Obamacare repeal.
1: We welcomed a new Top Idiot In Congress, Senator Joni Ernst. Dear god, six years of that laugh.
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.