Your Weekly Ten Is Celebrating Paul Manafort's First Morning In Jail

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Your Weekly Ten Is Celebrating Paul Manafort's First Morning In Jail

Hey Wonkers, are you tired? WE ARE TIRED. What a shitshow of a news week, but at least it ended with Paul Manafort going to jail, right? Hey Paul Manafort, HOW IS JAIL? Was your "breakfast" this morning tasty? Are they going to let you go out and play in the yard later? We have so many questions!


As you can see above, Wonkette toddler and her cousins did not have a shitshow week. They played in the lake and stuff! If you are nice, there will be pictures of toddlers in hula skirts at the bottom of this post.

OK it's time for your list of the top ten stories of the week!

Stories chosen by Beyoncé, as per usual:

1. This Is New And Scary.

2. Florida Skipped Background Checks For Concealed Gun Permits For A Year. Is That Bad?

3. Paul Manafort Probably Going To Jail Friday, So HAHAHAHAHAHA

4. And Speaking Of Whores ...

5. Man In Dumb Hat Thinks He's Gonna 'Shame' All The Gays, Abortion-Havers And Muslims

6. A Mommyblog, A Dating Site, And A FUCKING COMMUNITY

7. Mike Pence Condemns Mike Pence For Saying Thing Mike Pence Definitely Did Not Say

8. WE'RE NOT CRYING, DENNIS RODMAN IS CRYING

9. This Trump-Russia-NRA Shit Just Got A Whole Lot Weirder

10. How Is Trump Destroying Decades Of Western Peace And Prosperity Today?

So there you go. Those are your top ten most clicked upon stories, according to Beyoncé. They are very good stories!

OH HEY, one more thing. Know how Wonkette is fully funded by readers like you, and that's how we have salaries and servers and healthcare and liquor? If you want Wonkette to be here FOREVER, you gotta help us out, so won't you click here to do a $10 donation, or even better, a monthly subscription? WE LOVE YOU, YOU PAY OUR RENT.

As a reward, and as promised, it is HULA TODDLERS (Donna Rose and Cousin Dzho, just stone cold bein' three):

Donna Rose hula


Dzho

And DANCING!

(As you saw above, he got a hura skirt.) And MORE COUSINS and a HUSKY WOLF.


Let's see ... anything else? Nope, BYE.

Yours in baby Jesus,

Wonkette

Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

Wonkette salaries and servers are fully paid for by YOU! Please pay our salaries.

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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