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OK just fooling, we PERSONALLY do not have a new baby dog, as Lula, who is 15, would not permit that. She is queen of her castle and though she enjoys play dates and sleepovers with other dogs, her house is HER HOUSE.

But your editrix got one! Her name is Emma and she shits a lot, according to every time Rebecca has said "BRB gotta go clean up puppy shit" in the secret chatcave this week.

Here is a video, from which the ACTION SHOT of the dogs playing above came:

YAY DOGS!


OK, now shall we count down the top ten stories of the week? Yes, we shall.

Stories chosen as usual by Beyoncé:

10. FUCKING GIVE IT, BILL BARR

9. We Are All Kasie Hunt's Face Trying To Figure Out WTF George Papdopoulos Is Talking About

8. Paul Manafort Celebrates 70th Birthday With Loved Ones, APRIL FOOLS HE'S IN PRISON

7. Yr Wonkette Has The Complete Unredacted NICE THINGS Report!

6. QAnon Idiots Finally Go Too Far, Accuse Kate Bush Of Murder

5. The Dumbest Shit Trump Said About Windmills Last Night, From 'Cancer' To 'REEER! REEER!'

4. Let's Watch A Freshman Democrat Smack Mike Pompeo Around And Make Him SO MAD!

3. Trump Really Wants To Give You Mueller Report, But It's Under Audit And He Doesn't Want To

2. FUCKFEST IN UTAH, Y'ALL!

1. Get Your Popcorn Out, It's Time To Watch Alex Jones Make An Even Bigger Fool Of Himself Than Usual!

Hooray, those are good stories!

Let's see, anything else? Not unless Rebecca decides to pop more puppy pix in this post.

OK that's it.

Go with God!

Love,

Wonkette

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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