Wonkette toddler is almost a grown woman now.
OH HEY, it is Saturday morning, which means it's time for your top ten post, which is apparently obsessed with Brad, a Trump idiot. You see, LAST WEEK, we wrote this thing about Brad getting his ass handed to him on MSNBC, and we thought it was great and hilarious and all, but it went sort of viral, beyond all expectations we would ever have for "Brad." So here it is, THIS WEEK, and Brad is still in your top ten. In fact, it's NUMBER ONE! Brad is number one!
Probably the first time in his life. Scroll down for Brad, and also all the other top stories, which are lovely!
Before we count down, though, we can hear you crying out, "CAN I PLEASE DONATE SOME MONEY TO THE WONKETTE?" Awwwwww, you are kind of heart and sexxxy of ... whatever other parts. Why yes, you may, as we have no ads, therefore all our operating expenses and all our salaries are paid by YOU! Yes, you right there, and you really are looking nice today. Wonkette is taking on new writers and trying to give raises to the ones who work eleventy-three hours a week already to tell you amazing stories, and we want to be able to do this MORE AND MORE! So please please please sign up to do monthly donations, so we can grow and grow! Will you do that? They can be small monthly donations, medium monthly donations, or YOOGE monthly donations. It takes all kinds! We even take thousand dollar and million dollar donations, OR MONTHLY MILLION THOUSAND DOLLAR SUBSCRIPTIONS, like if you are a secret famous celebrity fan of Wonkette! Seriously, if you are able -- DO NOT MONEY US IF YOU CAN'T AFFORD IT -- then pull out your wallet and sign up to throw money on our face every month! You can also pull out an envelope and stamp and send money to Wonkette, PO Box 8765, Missoula MT 59807. Whatever, just please support us any way you can.
For instance, you could alsopurchase our sexxxy blue baseball caps. One of them says "Hell. No." and the other says "Literally Anyone Else 2020." See?
There are many other products in Ye Olde Wonkette Generale Store!
Look, it's the traditional Wonkette Baby Donation Pressure Lion Of Cuteness, who is Wonkette's Top Salesperson of the Month when it comes to shaking you down for donations/buying stuff:
YOU CANNOT EVEN RIGHT NOW
We shall now count down the top 10 stories of the week, chosen as usual by Beyoncé:
1. Meet Trump idiot "Brad," who got humiliated on MSNBC when he tried to mansplain "economy" to the hosts, who are financial experts. If you read it when it was the top story LAST WEEK, meet Brad again!
2. That Boston "Free Speech" rally ended early, because of all the thousands of counter-protesters who showed up to do free speech at the assholes.
3. Trump tried to call Heather Heyer's mom DURING HEATHER HEYER'S FUNERAL. Did he think she'd put him on speaker and let him talk to all the gathered mourners? Idiot.
4. Trump looked at the eclipse. Straight at it. Idiot.
5. Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin's wife Louise Linton let her GIANT ASSHOLE flag fly free this week.
6. Has it really been a week since Steve Bannon got quitfired? Well anyway, read our "and go fuck yourself" goodbye to him if you haven't.
7. Look at this dumb Boston bigot who went to Charlottesville and came back surprised everybody thinks he's some kind of dumb bigot.
8. Trump went to Phoenix, yelled a bunch of racist, incoherent shit, flew home.
9. Newt Gingrich CAN'T WAIT to move to Rome with Callista once she's confirmed as ambassdor to the Vatican. Once there, we will not be surprised if he starts fucking a local and divorces her.
10. And finally, here's somebody throwing coffee at Alex Jones, because that's fun.
So there you go. Those are your top ten most clicked upon stories, according to Beyoncé. They are very good stories!
Oh, hey, sign up for our newsletter RIGHT NOW DO IT DO IT DO IT:
You are very good! Here's another toddler picture, as a reward:
OK bye.
Yours in Christ,
Wonkette
Wonkette is fully funded by readers like YOU. If you love us, click below to fund us!
