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Hi, this week beat the shit out of us, so we're not even going to pretend like we're going to do some big set-up for the Top Ten post. Hey, look, it's a picture of Wonkette Toddler being a dancer! Hey guess what! There are a couple more below! Hey guess what! Give us money to keep the lights on here at ye olde Wonkette! Better yet? SUBSCRIBE MONTHLY! Or up your subscription! Thank you, we love you, you pay our rent.

Ready to count down the top stories? Yes, you are.


Stories chosen as usual by Beyoncé:

10. Hey Gun Nuts, The NRA's Been Having Greasy Orgies In Piles Of Your Hard-Earned Money

9. Junior's TOO DUMB To Be Indicted. Mueller Report Liveblog, Part Two!

8. Mike Huckabee Literally Thought April Ryan Was Speaking Literally About Beheading His Daughter

7. Laura Loomer Filed A Lawsuit Against Twitter Based On A Prank Someone Played On Her

6. Hey Jared Kushner, It's STFU-Thirty, AND YOU'RE LATE!

5. Oh No, Did Robert Mueller Do PEE TAPE LIBELS?

4. Fired White House Staffers Delighted To Go Bankrupt/To Jail To Protect President, You Bet!

3. Church Of Holy Bleach Drinking Offering $450 Seminars. We Say NO THANK YOU!

2. Seth Rich Died Before Assange Ever Received Hacked DNC Emails. Guess Who That's Not Stopping.

1. OH HELL YEAH, HASAN MINHAJ, SAY IT TO JARED'S STUPID FACE!

Hooray, those are very good stories!

Couple more dancer pics:

OK that's all, goodbye, go with God, etc.

Love,

Wonkette

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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