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Hi, this week beat the shit out of us, so we're not even going to pretend like we're going to do some big set-up for the Top Ten post. Hey, look, it's a picture of Wonkette Toddler being a dancer! Hey guess what! There are a couple more below! Hey guess what! Give us money to keep the lights on here at ye olde Wonkette! Better yet? SUBSCRIBE MONTHLY! Or up your subscription! Thank you, we love you, you pay our rent.

Ready to count down the top stories? Yes, you are.


Stories chosen as usual by Beyoncé:

10. Hey Gun Nuts, The NRA's Been Having Greasy Orgies In Piles Of Your Hard-Earned Money

9. Junior's TOO DUMB To Be Indicted. Mueller Report Liveblog, Part Two!

8. Mike Huckabee Literally Thought April Ryan Was Speaking Literally About Beheading His Daughter

7. Laura Loomer Filed A Lawsuit Against Twitter Based On A Prank Someone Played On Her

6. Hey Jared Kushner, It's STFU-Thirty, AND YOU'RE LATE!

5. Oh No, Did Robert Mueller Do PEE TAPE LIBELS?

4. Fired White House Staffers Delighted To Go Bankrupt/To Jail To Protect President, You Bet!

3. Church Of Holy Bleach Drinking Offering $450 Seminars. We Say NO THANK YOU!

2. Seth Rich Died Before Assange Ever Received Hacked DNC Emails. Guess Who That's Not Stopping.

1. OH HELL YEAH, HASAN MINHAJ, SAY IT TO JARED'S STUPID FACE!

Hooray, those are very good stories!

Couple more dancer pics:

OK that's all, goodbye, go with God, etc.

Love,

Wonkette

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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It started with them damn hats. (Image: Wikimedia Commons)

A guest post by "Knitsy McPurlson," which we suspect is not a real name.

Yr Wonkette is not the only website run by brilliant peoples unafraid to poke people with sharp, pointy sticks. Ravelry.com – a website for knitters, crocheters, and other folks interested in textiles and fiber arts – is poking people with knitting needles, which are very sharp indeed.

This past weekend, Ravelry.com's founders showed the world how easy it is to de-platform white nationalists and racists when they banned all "support of Donald Trump and his administration" from their website, concluding they "cannot provide a space that is inclusive of all and also allow support for open white supremacy." Seems like people smart enough to decode a knitting pattern are also smart enough to decode Trump's not-so-hidden message of racism and white nationalism.

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One day, God willing, my grandchildren will click open their history textbooks and read about the Central American migrant internment camps. They'll learn about sick kids, locked in cages, kept hungry and dirty and cold for weeks on end, and they'll be horrified.

"Bubbie," they'll say, "how could this happen in America? How could there be toddlers sleeping on the ground without blankets, without soap or toothbrushes to clean themselves?"

"I don't know. I wish I had done more. I'm ashamed," I'll say. We will all have to answer for this atrocity. But some of us will have to answer more than others. Not just the archvillains like Stephen Miller and John Kelly, but the people who kept right on doing their jobs, even as those jobs morphed into defending concentration camps.

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