Donate

Your Weekly Top Ten Is Too Exhausted To Make A Clever Headline Right Now

popular

Hey Wonkers! Top Ten post! And more pictures of Wonkette Toddler!

We have literally nothing else to say, our brain is now dead. How dead? We wrote in a post this week that the governor of New York is Mario Cuomo, because apparently we have forgotten what decade we live in. If we refer to the governor of New York as "Rivers Cuomo" anytime soon, call the doctor.

Before we count down the top ten stories, your obligatory money beg, because if you love Wonkette, we need you to SUPPORT WONKETTE. Give us money to keep the lights on up in here! Better yet? SUBSCRIBE MONTHLY! Or up your subscription! Thank you, we love you, you pay our rent.

Ready to count down the top stories? Yes, you are.


Stories chosen as usual by Beyoncé:

10. We've Got Some AI-Generated Nice Things For You Today. Isn't That Nice?

9. Ohio Psyched To Test Out New Forced Birth Law On 11-Year-Old Rape Victim

8. Trump Retweeted A Bunch Of Professional Bigots This Morning, Which Should Surprise No One

7. Who Put These Pubes All Over My First Amendment?

6. The President's Brain Fell Out Again, Anybody Got A Bucket And A Mop?

5. Jacob Wohl Spits Up Own Dick Again

4. Was It Jerry Falwell Jr. In The Outhouse With The Pool Boy? DOES WONKETTE WIN THE GAME OF 'CLUE'?

3. Jerk Landlady Refused To Rent To Muslim Tenants, Now Owes Them $675K

2. AND YET SHE PERSISTED In Reading Mueller Report Right To Mitch McConnell's Dumb Face

1. Donald Trump Don't Want A Pickle, Just Wants To Ride His Motor-Sickle

Hooray, those are very good stories!

Here's another kid picture:

OK that's all, goodbye, go with God, etc.

Love,

Wonkette

Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter RIGHT HERE, DO IT RIGHT HERE!

Wonkette is ad-free and funded ONLY by YOU, our dear readers. Click below to keep the lights on, please. We appreciate you, most of the time.

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

$
Donate with CC
Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Newsletter

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc