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We were somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the drugs began to take hold.


San Francisco, did you know you've been added to the Wonkette Wonkebago Fall 2015 Itinerant Panhandling Tour and Grifterthon?

Las Vegas, join us Sunday (tomorrow? today?), Oct. 25, at the Summerlin, Nevada, home of Wonkers Frances and Don, and we gonna burn this mother down. Or not. You know, there are kids around. (Bring yours too!) Anyway, help us while away the heat of the afternoon and grill foods with us and drink our beers and kiss us on our mouths, because we love you, you sexy beasts. 2-7 p.m., 3258 Velvet Rose St., Las Vegas NV 89135 blah blah.

Bring what you like! Bring a friend! Bring some "Colorado Treats," if'n you know what I mean and you know what I mean.

Coming up!

Los Angeles -- Tues., Oct. 27 at Cole's downtown, 6-10 p.m.

Orange County -- Thurs., Oct. 29, still don't know where.

San Diego -- Sun., Nov. 1, at a park, I am guessing.

San Francisco -- Nov. 7, location TBA. San Fran wonkers, tell your friends!

Our Salt Lake City party was amazing -- we annexed the Salt Lake Drinking Liberally like Baby Hitler, AND THEY LIKED IT. Did you know SLC is a Democratic city? ME TOO EITHER! Big Love and ups to @ballerinax, @michaelorton, and the rest of the welcoming party who made us feel like Barack Obama getting driven around personally by the king of wherever, back when he was wooing Old Europe and the rest of the world before whoopin' John McCain, Mitt Romney, and everyone he's ever run against, haha lol.

OK bye.

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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