ACORN Still Dead, Republicans Still Trying To Kill It Some More In New Budget Bill


So we have a Keep-the-Government-Running agreement on the way, hooray, and among all the fun stuff like keeping the lights on, paying to fight Ebola, and cutting the IRS budget just for the sheer dickishness of it, there's a clause that makes sure no funds ever go to ACORN or any of its successors. Now, mere mortals might scoff at such a thing, since as we all know, ACORN is as dead as James O'Keefe's cerebral cortex, but we also know that if there's anything Republicans love, it's a chance to stick a symbolic knife through the metaphorical ribs of a notional enemy. And so the inevitable line in the budget bill (no, you can't make us say "cromnibus" ... oh, poop):

"None of the funds made available under this or any other Act, or any prior Appropriations Act, may be provided to the Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now (ACORN), or any of its affiliates, subsidiaries, allied organizations, or successors."

Happily, HuffPo's Zach Carter is just as amused by this ritualistic shivving of a dead horse as we are, so he went looking for some answers, and here's what he turned up:

Jennifer Hing, a spokeswoman for the House Appropriations Committee explained to HuffPost in 2013 that the anti-ACORN language was essentially legislative boilerplate, routinely inserted into every appropriations bill that came out of a few subcommittees. Hing stopped responding to requests for comment on HuffPost's ACORN funding stories after four or five iterations, and declined to comment for this article as well.

Got it? Defunding ACORN is now just something Republicans do automatically, like pledging allegiance to the flag, sucking the NRA's well-oiled gun barrel, or repealing Obamacare. The same language appeared in the continuing resolution from January of this year. It's not a story anymore. After enough repetition, it will simply be a ritual that surprises nobody, and the very idea of not defunding ACORN will be considered rather ridiculous. A hundred years from now, homeschooled children will celebrate the defeat of ACORN by eating little nut-flavored hamantaschen, and their parents will tell them of the brave man with a camera and some editing software who brought Freedom to us all and made sure that poor people would never vote again.


Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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