Alex Jones: Who, me?

Approximately ten minutes after Connecticut Judge Barbara Bellis tacked another $473 million in punitive damages on top of the $965 million compensatory jury award in the second Sandy Hook defamation lawsuit, Alex Jones launched himself at the bankruptcy court, where he continues to flop around like a goldfish on shag carpet.

A normal person who spent all of 2022 trying and failing to get the bankruptcy court to rescue him from the consequences of defaming the parents of murdered children and calling them "crisis actors" might have handled this differently. But Alex Jones is not normal. So ...

After trying and failing to delay the trials by putting three worthless LLCs in bankruptcy, Jones declared Infowars's parent company Free Speech Systems (FSS) bankrupt, forcing him to open his books up to the scrutiny of both the US Bankruptcy Trustee and the Sandy Hook plaintiffs. Thanks in part to his insistence that FSS owes all its money to a Nevada LLC owned by Jones and his parents, Jones's preferred restructuring team got booted from the case, something US Bankruptcy Judge Christopher Lopez said he'd never done before and hoped never to do again. The gambit did succeed in getting the US Trustee all the way up his company's ass, though, so, well played, sir!

With FSS's assets tied up in bankruptcy, Jones found himself on the hook for the entire jury award in both Texas and Connecticut — a cool $1.5 billion — hence the personal bankruptcy filing earlier this month, since the only thing worse than letting the Sandy Hook plaintiffs paw through his assets is being forced to cut them a check. But being Alex Jones, he immediately set out to make himself as obnoxious as possible to both the US Trustee and the court itself.

First he filed a status report in which he claimed to have "lost a great deal of money trusting people who did not have the ability or the character to handle the finances," and unsubtly threatening to drag the proceedings out forever if the Sandy Hook plaintiffs refuse to take a massive haircut on their damages claims.

"While Jones comes to this Court in good faith and wants to reach an amicable resolution between all the parties, it is imperative that all parties do the same," he wrote. "Any argument that Jones must give up his public life, or discontinue public discourse is contrary to supporting his ability to fund a plan and pay creditors, leaving Jones with limited options."

Then he demanded that the bankruptcy court join his personal bankruptcy case with FSS and stay all appeals of the state tort cases, forcing the plaintiffs to wait for Jones to dick around in bankruptcy before they can adjudicate their damage claims in state appeals court. This prompted the US Trustee and the Subchapter V Trustee to chime in as one to say not just NO but HELL NO. For a longer discussion of the nuances of the Jones bankruptcy, check out this podcast from Opening Arguments (full disclosure: I appear regularly on the show). But in essence, FSS is on a fast-track bankruptcy, which it began five months ago, while Jones is on a normal track. He'd like to synchronize the schedules to allow him to delay the appeals as a means of squeezing the Sandy Hook plaintiffs even further, and the plaintiffs and trustees would like not that.

On top of this, Jones argues he has a contractual right to be paid his full $1.3 million salary from FSS — of which he is the full owner, and which he himself placed in bankruptcy — because the $10,000 weekly salary he's getting under the current court-approved terms is not enough for him to live on. No, not even with $22,325 in credit card reimbursements this month alone. Let's take a wildass guess that the request by an insider to be paid even more cash to honor a contract he made with himself is probably not going to make the US Trustee like Alex Jones more.

HOW WILL HE LIVE. Alex Jones Is No Peasant, Cannot Possibly Live On $10K Per Week, He Tells Bankruptcy Court

At a hearing yesterday, Judge Lopez said he'd take the salary request under advisement. As for delaying the appeals, however, that's a big NOPE. The parties have subsequently agreed to modify the stay and allow the appeals processes to run concurrently with the bankruptcies. Which means that Alex Jones's gross weirdo lawyer Norm Pattis is gonna need to get paid.

Luckily you, YES YOU, can help. Alex Jones has a GiveSendGo griftbux page to defray the cost of paying his lawyers, and there's already upwards of $300,000 in his Christmas stocking.

Now, Alex has been marked for destruction. After being the test case for internet censorship, Alex is now the test case for law fare seeking to destroy political opposition and dissent. Big tech was successful deplatforming Alex because the lack of response at the time. Now, left wing radicals are attempting to destroy Alex via the court system. Don't let them be successful in their new weapon against Free Speech, law fare. Stand up for Alex by making a donation to his legal defense and keeping him in the fight everyday.

Or you could do literally anything else with your money.

[FSS Bankruptcy Docket / Jones Bankruptcy Docket]

Click the widget to keep your Wonkette ad-free and feisty. And if you're ordering from Amazon, use this link, because reasons.

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Liz Dye

Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.


How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)


©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc