America Could Have Been Saved If We'd Listened To Glenn Beck, Says Glenn Beck

America Could Have Been Saved If We'd Listened To Glenn Beck, Says Glenn Beck

Broken-brained Glenn Beck is sad for America. Again.

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Why are you sad this time, Glenn? It is because some people who hate the United States of Israel said they would not listen to the Tuesday address by Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu to Congress, even before they listened to it.

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Beck told all of his radio show listeners (hi, Mrs. Glenn Beck!) that "it is critical that you watch" the Netanyahu's speech "because the forces arrayed against it are astronomical." And you know what that reminds him of, which also makes him sad? Another time someone gave a speech -- in fact, the Greatest And Most Importantest Speech Given On U.S. American Soil -- that some people refused to listen to, which is sad, because it could have saved America, if only.

Have you ever seen a speech that hasn’t been given get this much attention? I mean, the last speech I saw get this much attention before it was given was 8/28. Do you remember the build up of 8/28? For months they talked about what a hate speech that would be. How dangerous that would be. And then, once it was given, if America would have listened to it, it could have actually changed the course -- and I do believe it did change the course of many people. It had its desired outcome, I believe, for the Lord.

Just in case you for some strange reason do not remember the build up of 8/28, or even what the hell Beck is talking about, here is a hint: It was a speech given by Glenn Beck in 2010, on 8/28 obviously, at a rally he called "Restoring Honor, Or How I Co-opted The Anniversary Of Martin Luther King Jr.'s 'I Have A Dream' Speech Like A Total Asshole." Flashback thingy time!

Prominent theologian Glenn Beck has been busy hanging streamers and making his favorite Metamucil-infused punch in preparation for this weekend’s “Restoring Honor” rally, where he and Ted Nugent will reclaim the civil rights movement from the Ghost of Martin Luther King Jr. and riddle it with bullets. Beck says his festival is going to be “the Woodstock of the next generation,” as well as “the anti-Woodstock.” He’s also calling the event an “American miracle,” which sounds more credible than the Woodstock stuff given Beck’s an expert on religion.

The speech was a great success, with many America and much patriots, or at least cosplay patriots.

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And that is why teach our schoolchildren now about the day that changed America, when Glenn Beck did a speech to it, but how -- damnit, sad face again -- it could have changed America even more harder if only we had listened to it, for the Lord.



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