Anthony Scaramucci Taps Out ... Long After The Ref Called The Match

Post-Racial America
Anthony Scaramucci Taps Out ... Long After The Ref Called The Match

Oh, noes! We've had another Scaramucci outbreak. Quick, grab the cortisone and start rubbing before it spreads!

That's right, the Mooch is back, baby. Do you have questions about Donald Trump's mental competence? Or who in Washington can suck his own cock? Or perhaps the finer plot points of The Wizard of Oz?

Clearly you need to have done A LOT of drugs to parse that analogy, but if we had to guess, he's saying Donald Trump is a crazy melted green witch, so all the Republicans will now abandon him and become Friends of Dorothy for Mike Pence.

Or perhaps Donald Trump is a melting Russian nuclear reactor? Splain us, Axios!

"We are now in the early episodes of 'Chernobyl' on HBO, where the reactor is melting down and the apparatchiks are trying to figure out whether to cover it up or start the clean-up process," Scaramucci said.

"A couple more weeks like this and 'country over party' is going to require the Republicans to replace the top of the ticket in 2020."

Oh, Mooch, you sweet summer child. Do you honestly think the GOP is going to abandon a president with a 90 percent Republican approval rating just because he's a demented, racist loon who's already tweeted us into a trade war and will probably get us into a shooting one before the year is out?

Right now, it's an unspeakable thing. But if he keeps it up, it will no longer be unspeakable. The minute they start speaking of it, it will circulate and be socialized. We can't afford a full nuclear contamination site post 2020.

Alrighty then!

Of course these two Übermenschen are duking it out on Twitter.

"Recently" he said offensive shit? Not during the campaign when he threatened to bar all Muslims from entering the country? Or when he mocked a disabled reporter? Or when he attacked a gold star parent? Or when he called the Charlottesville Nazis "very fine people?" Or when he fired Andy McCabe two hours before his pension would vest after viciously attacking him and the rest of the FBI for years on end? RECENTLY?

(And why is That Idiot referring to himself with scare quotes as "President Trump"? We're guessing it's not a tacit admission that he was illegitimately elected with Russian help.)

Mooch is now trying to re-cast himself as the vanguard of the coming wave of righteous Republicans who will abandon Trump in favor of someone not obviously insane. You know, now that they got their tax cut.

Five minutes ago he was all about "short-term economic gain," but now he's Dietrich Boenhoffer resisting the Nazis.

And anyone who points out that he's an attention whore who's entirely full of shit can SHUT UP. Literally.

But, hey, memo to Stephanie Grisham: Mooch is a manly man who doesn't get his feelings hurt, okay?

Perhaps we could be more gracious when former Trumpers have a come to Jesus moment and decide to start saying out loud what they've known forever. But that's not really the Wonkette way! So let's all give the Mooch a nice, shiny participation trophy for making a mad dash for the door when he belatedly realized that everyone associated with this mess will have Trumpstink on them as long as they live. Not that it'll work, but ... you're doing great, sweetie really! (Not really.)


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Liz Dye

Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.


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