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Anthony Weiner Twit-Pic-Dick Scandal Ends In Tears, Dick Jokes

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BREAKING!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anthony Weiner's was the weiner in "the weiner picture." THANK YOU, ANTHONY WEINER, you have now guaranteed that greasy pustule Andrew Breitbart will never go away, ever.

Weiner went on the teevee and tearfully admitted to a roomful of reporters that he, not a hacker, tweeted the laughably tame photo of a peen in gray boxers to some ladies on the internet. Weiner, typical Democrat, not only cried at the press briefing, but he revealed that he failed to actually sex any of the half dozen ladies in question. Someone never read the scandal manual.

Weiner won't resign, didn't bother to misuse any public funds or break any laws, and he won't get a divorce. Where are the prostitutes, the interns, the diapers?

"I have made some terrible mistakes," Mr. Weiner said. "I have not been honest."

Mr. Weiner said that after he sent the underwear photo on Twitter on May 27, "Once I realized I had posted it on Twitter I panicked, I took it down and said I'd been hacked."

He added, "To be clear, the picture was of me, and I sent it."

Mr. Weiner said he had inappropriate communications with six women over the past three years as part of a "consensual exchange of e-mails" with the women.

Meh, we give it maybe a 4 out of 10. Weiner seems to have been prompted to come clean after more photos surfaced on BigGovernment.com this morning, one of them showing a smiling Weiner at home on a sofa with his cats. TRULY THE STUFF OF OUTRAGE.

Even the women he was busy "sexting" with found him to be pretty mild. ABC News got an exclusive interview with Megan Broussard, a 26-year-old nurse in Texas with whom Weiner had been corresponding after she "liked" one of his video clips on YouTube. She had the following highly revelatory remarks:

Broussard, who describes herself as disinterested in politics and previously unaware of Weiner, said that she has never met the congressman in person and doesn't "think he's a bad guy." And, she said, she actively participated in "sexting" -- as she has done frequently with other men online -- with the man she presumed to be Weiner.

LIVE BOYS OR DEAD GIRLZ NEXT TIME, PLZ.  [NYTimes/ ABC News]

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