Anti-Abortion Group Vows To Rebuild After Tragic Glitter Bombing
As if you needed any further proof that there are extremists on both side of the abortion issue, consider the recent heinous attack launched on the anti-abortion website "LifeNews," which was hit last week with a full-scale assault of glitter mailed in a letter. But it was threatening terrorist glitter, and proof that Both Sides Do It, although one side has been a bit more partial to firebombing clinics and shooting doctors, nurses, and receptionists dead.
The reaction from LifeNews was swift: They sent out a fundraising email Saturday with the subject heading "URGENT! Our office was bombed, we need your help!"
The fundraising letter explained that LifeNews has been targeted by multiple glitter bombings from a group calling itself "Glitter Bombs For Choice," and detailed the devastating toll that the relentless attacks have taken:
Over the last few weeks, abortion activists have sent several glitter bomb letters to LifeNews, some with threatening messages. When our staff open the letters, glitter poured inside goes everywhere and makes a huge mess.
Oh, the humanity! At least Bill O'Reilly hasn't claimed that he witnessed the merciless bombing of the innocent activists. Yet.
Glitter Bombs For Choice has also sent its Weapons of Mass Reflection to several other anti-choice groups, including Texas Right to Life, which complained that they were an attempt to "silence" the pro-life groups; Jezebel's Anna Merlan notes that this is a very real possibility: "Maybe if your vocal cords got filled with glitter dust? Seems unlikely, though." Oh, sure, laugh it up, but have you looked at the statistics on elementary teachers suffering from glitter lung?
Merlan goes on to observe that the glitter bombs are just one end of an entire spectrum of atrocities in the national debate on abortion:
According to the National Abortion Federation, abortion clinics have been bombed 42 times since 1977, suffered another 99 attempted bombings, at least 550 incidences of abortion providers and employees being stalked, as well as the 100 or so times clinics were sprayed with butyric acid (causing respiratory distress and mass hospital visits for both patients and staff). Oh yeah, and the eight people who have been murdered: four doctors, two employees, a security guard, and a clinic escort, gunned down at clinics, at their homes, or, in Dr. George Tiller's case, as he served as an usher at church.
So as they say, both sides do it. And there's no sign that Glitter Bombs for Choice has any intention of stopping; they may even escalate to such potentially lethal weapons as streamers (potential strangulation hazards) and helium balloons, which are filled with a gas that humans cannot breathe without suffering comical vocal effects.
It is not known whether Life News reported the attack to the Glitter Bomb Squad so that the letter could be safely disposed of. Yr Wonkette is also worried that this very report may prove traumatic to the group, which may well solicit additional financial support to help its employees recover from Post-Butthurt Pearl-Clutching Syndrome.
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.