Bamz every time he thinks about Sarah Palin.

Ooh, we have a little quotable nugget from our president, Barry Bamz Of Kenya, for to share with everyone! Why do we find ourselves in this terrible place in American history, where Donald J. Trump, shitty businessman, stupid man, and all around leaking carbuncle on the anus of humanity, is the Republican nominee for US American president? Well, it was Sarah Palin's fault, you see:

...[W]hat you realized during the course of the first six, eight, ten months of the administration was that the attitudes, the moods that I think Sarah Palin had captured during the election increasingly were representative of the Republican activist base, its core. [...]

I see a straight line from the announcement of Sarah Palin as the vice-presidential nominee to what we see today in Donald Trump, the emergence of the Freedom Caucus, the tea party, and the shift in the center of gravity for the Republican Party. Whether that changes, I think, will depend in part on the outcome of this election, but it’s also going to depend on the degree of self-reflection inside the Republican Party.

BLAME IT ON PRINCESS MOOSE GIBLETS! Silly president, what is he EVEN talking about, drawing straight lines between Sarah Palin's Alaskan snow-capped word salad and Donald Trump's rectum of a mouth hole? Well! He's talking about the "Five Days That Shaped A Presidency," by which he means his presidency, in a REALLY LONG, REALLY GREAT interview with Jonathan Chait in New York Magazine.

See what we just did to you right there? We gave you a funny headline about Sarah Palin, you clicked on it, and now you have to read #SeriousTalk from the president. Sucks to be you!

Anyway, as you might have guessed, the interview focuses on Five Big Things, and they are, in order:

  1. The Republicans
  2. Obamacare
  3. The BP Oil Spill
  4. Cuba
  5. Drones

All very sexxxy exciting topics. Now we will throw a few random quotes at you, all of which will entice you to go read the entire interview while you're having your champagne brunch.

On the subject of shaking Cuban leader Raúl Castro's hand at Nelson Mandela's funeral, we learn what an all-around nice guy Barry Bamz really is. Also he doesn't give a fuck:

BAMZ: Here’s been a general rule of my presidency: I think normal human responses, basic courtesy, is not checked at the door when you become president. And I’d already shaken hands with Hugo Chávez when I was at my first Summit of the Americas.

JONATHAN CHAIT: But that was used against you.

BAMZ: Yeah, but I didn't care ...

Don't you want to see why he didn't care? Well then you must read the interview!

On the subject of whether Obama turns into the lovechild of Lenin and Saul Alinsky during his negotiations with Republicans, we learn that Obama doesn't think Lenin and Saul Alinsky were his real dads at all:

...[W]hen I was in the Senate, I had good relations across the aisle. The notion that somehow I show up here and I become Saul Alinsky or Lenin in meetings with Republicans probably doesn’t ring true.

"Probably." PFFFFFFFFFT!

On the subject of actually working with Republicans to get things done, we learn that Obama has to help them save face with their paste-eating constituents:

[I]t’s pretty hard for them to publicly say, “Obama’s a perfectly reasonable guy, but we just can’t work with him because our base thinks he’s the Antichrist.” It’s a lot easier for them to say, “Oh, the guy’s not listening to us,” or, “He’s uncompromising.” I understand that, it’s not something that has bothered me personally. In fact, sometimes I tease them about it behind the scenes; I’ll tell them, “Look, if you need some help, me attacking you or you know …” And the times where we have gotten things done, it has been very important for me to, frankly, help them try to manage their base.

Bamz is OK with being the Antichrist, as long as he's the Antichrist who GETS SHIT DONE.

OK, that is enough quotes, so if you are a person who reads words good and wants to learn Obama's Reflections in the waning days of his presidency, you may now proceed to New York Magazine. If you are not that kind of person, here is a funny moving picture of a cat, for your amusement:

[New York Magazine]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.


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