Big Bad Harley Davidson Bikers SO SCARED Of Protesters, Won't Let Trump Look At Their Hogs

Actual Paul Rubens, not a cosplay

Well this has to be disappointing for Mad President Dogbane: He's been disinvited from using the Harley-Davidson motorcycle factory in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, as a backdrop for yet another executive order signing. Trump had been planning to sign some executive orders "related to American manufacturing" there Thursday, but the company cancelled the visit because it wasn't too crazy about being beset by thousands of hippie protesters yammering about immigration, according to an unnamed "administration official" who spoke to CNN. It's really rather a pity, since Trump would surely appreciate the great machines made by Harley-Davidson, which are famous for making up in the production of noise what they lack in actual performance. Here, let's have Wolf Blitzer 'splainer it to you:

As Donna Rose's favorite babbysitter Charles Pierce, esq. points out,

A company that annually hosts a convention of huge people who look like they could eat entire motorcycles and come back later for the sidecars does not dare host the President of the United States for fear of protest. Jesus, it took Nixon almost five years to get this bunkered unto himself, and he was fighting an unpopular war while subverting the Constitution. So far, President* Trump is only doing one of those and he's already getting his bookings canceled as though he were the Doors two weeks after Jim Morrison whipped it out in Miami. This is not a tenable situation for anyone.

We hear that Trump was initially very upset that he wouldn't get the chance to ride a hog, at least until he was informed that a "hog" was a motorcycle and he lost interest. We can only imagine what he'll be tweeting about the company in an attempt to hurt their stock price.

Harley-Davidson, for its part, is going full Alternative Facts on the matter. Us? Scared of some wimpy protesters in pussy hats? Never!

Harley-Davidson issued a statement Tuesday night saying they "don't have, nor did we have, a scheduled visit from the President this week at any of our facilities."

"We are proud to have hosted Presidential visits at our facilities. Three of the last five presidents -- Ronald Reagan, George W. Bush and Bill Clinton -- have visited us at our facilities. These visits are a testament to the pride and passion of our employees and their great work building Harley-Davidson motorcycles," said Maripat Blankenheim, director of Harley-Davidson's corporate communication. "We look forward to hosting the president in the future."

Uh-huh. First off, there is no way that "Maripat Blankenheim" is not a name from Lemony Snicket. And as for that "no, there never was a photo op" stuff, that's not what the anonymous Trump administration official said (this administration is leakier than a badly rebuilt 1977 Shovelhead).

We're sure the president will find someplace to host his signing of the Buy American Stuff (unless you're building a Trump hotel) executive order, someplace that isn't afraid of protesters, a manufacturing floor where they're still proud of what they produce. And that doesn't have stairs. Maybe the Oval Office, which is currently busy manufacturing bad government in record quantities.

Liz Warren looks great on a big old motorcycle, we should add. And she isn't afraid of ANYTHING.

[CNN / Esquire]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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