Big Dumb Convoy Members Meet With Big Dumb Senators Cruz, Johnson

Right Wing Extremism
Big Dumb Convoy Members Meet With Big Dumb Senators Cruz, Johnson

A bunch of spoiled brats calling themselves the “People’s Convoy” circled the Washington DC Beltway for more than four hours Sunday in defiant protest of pandemic restrictions that mostly don’t exist. The organizers’ stated goal was to be a “huge pain,” but they couldn’t even manage that. The disruption they caused Sunday was reportedly minimal.

The anti-vaxx MAGA parade of trucks, cars, and SUVs started out in a deliberately slow-moving crawl that stretched about 30 miles, but it just sort of fizzled into nothing after merging with normal Beltway traffic. That was Sunday, though. Monday, the convoy planned to obstruct commuter-heavy traffic. Less than a year ago, Florida Republicans made this sort of traffic “protest” a felony, but the convoy isn’t protesting police violence, which still occurs. They’re clogging traffic over vaccine mandates that are literally scheduled to end soon.

PREVIOUSLY: Big Dumb US Trucker Convoy Limps Off To Washington DC

Check out just one of these American heroes, who for some reason showed up dressed like an extra from Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Sir Covid declared: "I believe [the convoy’s] a people’s crusade ... People have to fight the evil in the world, and people have to band together and fight on the side of the Lord.”




People’s Convoy organizer Brian Brase claims, "We are law-abiding citizens that are just exercising our rights to this protest,” although I’m not sure how legal it is to deliberately obstruct traffic.

Naturally, Ted Cruz and Ron Johnson were eager to take a ride on the convoy. The GOP senators announced Monday that they’d meet with the truckers to discuss “to discuss the harmful effects of President Biden’s vaccine mandates.” The "M*A*S*H” series finale is a more relevant topic at this point.

During the meeting, Cruz told the truckers that what they’re doing is “incredibly important,” even though it’s not clear what they’re actually doing beyond clogging traffic. Cruz himself is a professionally annoying, self-important gasbag, so it makes sense that he’d admire these guys.



Cruz ranted to the truckers about Canadian tyranny, which was absurdly overblown even before an actual authoritarian despot rained hell on a sovereign nation. It’s not surprising that Cruz fails to rise to the seriousness of this moment.

CRUZ: We’ve seen ... particularly concerning COVID-19 and mandates. We’ve seen a particularly nasty combination of government authoritarians. We saw this in Canada, with Canadian politicians reaching out to their buddies in Big Tech and GoFundMe to steal $10 million from truckers.

That’s a damn lie. GoFundMe, a private company, didn’t wants its platform used to help finance illegal activity. That’s not theft. It didn’t keep the money. Cruz also falsely claimed that White House press secretary Jen Psaki demanded Spotify “pull Joe Rogan down.” She actually just supported the channel’s decision to include content warnings on his more medically idiotic broadcasts.

Cruz could’ve told the truckers the truth — that COVID-19 restrictions are ending across the nation. Instead, he just fanned the flames and made the situation worse. That’s a habit of his. We don’t need to imagine how he’d respond if Democratic senators from Virginia and Maryland went to Texas and egged on leftwing protests that disrupted residents’ commutes.

Brase told reporters after meeting with Cruz and Johnson: "We’re going to keep looping the Beltway until we’re heard. We’re not going anywhere.” He’s paid full price for his tantrum and he plans to see it through. He did acknowledge the mask mandates that have been lifted but absurdly took credit for them. The same brain trust that isn’t so sure masking reduces COVID-19 transmission have no problem connecting a change in COVID-19 policy with the timing of their convoy launch.

I can’t even with these people.

[Washington Post]

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. Once, he wrote a novel called “Mahogany Slade,” which you should read or at least buy. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."

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