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They could be doing ANYTHING on that computer! Planning terrorism, or evenCONDEMNING it!


In the aftermath of Monday's attack on students at Ohio State University, most normal people reacted with relief that the initial reports of an "active shooter" were inaccurate, that all eleven victims are expected to survive, and that a campus policeman, Alan Horujko, quickly brought the attack to an end by shooting and killing the suspect, 18-year-old Abdul Razak Ali Artan (one woman may have been accidentally hit in the foot by a stray bullet as well). Most normal people probably thought, "Thank god it was 'only' a car and a knife, and not a semiautomatic rifle." Ah, but you know what the good folks at Dead Breitbart's Home for Perpetual Fear thought? They immediately thought MUSLIM REFUGEES ARE GOING TO STAB US ALL, AND IT'S ESTABLISHMENT REPUBLICANS' FAULT!! Oh, yeah, and Obama's, too.

You have to admire the fearmongering in this lede by Breitbart horcrux Julia Hahn:

The Somali refugee responsible for attacking young Americans at Ohio State University was deliberately imported into the country by the nation’s federal immigration policy–yet the scale and impact of immigration from undeveloped, foreign cultures is still a surprise to some politicians.

Since 2001, the United States has permanently resettled nearly 100,000 migrants from Somalia–a nation where the prevalence rate of Female Genital Mutilation for women and girls ages 15 to 49 is 98 percent, and where homosexuality can be punishable by death. In a single year, a Republican-led Congress funded visas for nearly 300,000 (temporary and permanent) Muslim migrants, which is a population that is nearly twice the size of the entire population of Dayton, Ohio.

The whole thing is a masterpiece of emotional race anxiety and button-pushing: Artan wasn't just a refugee, he was "invited" to come to the U.S. by the federal government, and "his refugee status allowed him to fill a coveted slot at Ohio State University" -- clearly one that a good white non-murderous Christian should have had. Even worse, his status as a refugee "also allowed him to obtain federal benefits, and eventually would have given him quick access to citizenship, the voting booth, and the ability to bring over foreign relatives through chain migration."

And what are Republicans doing to protect Real Americans from this murderous tide of Muslim Blackamoors? Nothing! (Or as Hahn subtly puts it, "Republican lawmakers seem unaware of the social and cultural impact that large-scale Muslim migration has had in their own backyards.") Hahn cites a 2015 Breitbart interview with Ohio Rep. Jim Jordan, and is shocked, shocked at his ignorance, saying he was asked

about Ohio’s Somali population and reports documenting how more than 20,000 girls in Ohio are at risk of having their sexual organs cut from their bodies through the Somali practice of female genital mutilation.

“In Ohio? Wow,” Jordan, who is the chairman of the House Freedom Caucus, said in response.

That's pretty good. Not that 20,000 Somali girls in Ohio are victims of FGM -- which we will go on record as saying is a barbaric practice -- but that simply by being Somali, they might be subject to it. And maybe other girls, too, if the Somalis have their way!!!

A teensy detail left out by Hahn: FGM is a federal crime in the United States (but is not a crime under state law in 26 states, including Ohio). All those refugee women and girls Hahn is pretending to care about would be a hell of a lot more likely to be victims of FGM if they stayed in Somalia, and in fact fear of FGM is recognized by the UN as a reason to grant refugee status. So hey, let's be afraid of refugees because of a practice that people become refugees to escape! It makes every bit as much sense as excluding victims of ISIS terrorism because we're afraid of terrorism.

Hahn goes on at great length about the horrors of radical Islam sneaking into America along with Somali refugees, and it's the usual catalog of atrocity bullshit seeking to paint all refugees as ticking time bombs, so the hell with it. (We would note that we are supposed to be terrified of all 50,000 Somali migrants since 2007, because 20 -- count 'em, twenty -- Somali-Americans from Minnesota have tried to join ISIL or Al-Shabaab.) Breitbart also ran a Milo Yiannopoulos piece calling on Donald Trump to permanently ban all Muslim immigration forever, to "stop more Ohio States from happening." Excellent call. That way, we'll only have to worry about more Virginia Techs and Sandy Hooks and Aurora movie theaters and Emanuel AME Churches and Umpqua Community Colleges, you see. You know, the normal mass shootings we're all accustomed to, not terrorism.

But before we leave this edition of Breitbart Watch, we'd like to offer a very special Fuck You to whoever chose the photo accompanying Hahn's story about Weak Establishment Republicans who won't protect us from terrifying Somali immigrants. Those scary-looking Somali guys in the photo up top? That's an AP photo from a press conference held by Somali-American community leaders to condemn terrorism, following a Somali immigrant's knife attack at a mall in Minnesota in September. Terrorists, people condemning terrorism, they all look alike, don't they?

[Breitbart / CNN / Columbus Dispatch]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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