Brian Kilmeade: Won't Somebody Think Of The Trump Concentration Camp Guards' FEELINGS?!?!?!

We've clearly moved past the point of the GOP feigning outrage over Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez calling Trump's concentration camps "concentration camps." We've seen them from above. We've heard what's really going on there, from sitting members of Congress. We've learned of women being told to drink from toilets and children with the flu locked in cages and denied medical treatment and people dying. We know some of the children locked in cages speak neither Spanish nor English, because they are indigenous people fleeing violence and starvation in their home countries, and that the American concentration camps are unequipped to communicate with them. We know that guards are being physically threatening and sexually suggestive and just generally hostile toward sitting members of Congress who show up for planned inspections. And we also now know that more than 9,500 current and former Border Patrol employees have a secret Facebook group, where they LOL it up about abusing children and sexually assaulting members of Congress, not to mention the hilarity that ensues in there over people dying in their custody.

We know. Everybody knows. One of the major political parties, the one that controls the Senate and the White House, is OK with this. We've moved from "it can't happen here" to "yes it actually can," and all the way to "and now it is happening here."

So now, over there on the Fox News Presidential Dick Sucking Network For Sucking The President's Dick, they are doing their best to redirect our sympathies to the REAL victims here, the wonderful and patriotic men and women who work at the concentration camps. And to do so, "Fox & Friends" couch idiot Brian Kilmeade is using very strange analogies:

BRIAN KILMEADE (CO-HOST): Here's the thing. Picture yourself, you have a house, family of five.

K. Two gay dads, two adopted kids and a crazy aunt named Reba who came to live with them, because every gay dad sitcom needs a crazy Aunt Reba!

You have a party, you have 30 people over. Maybe you have a big party and you have 100 people over and you have two and a half baths.

OK, we got it. Two and a half baths, including Aunt Reba's bathroom. (Chad and Britt need to add on to the house!) We have invited 100 people over. Hilarity is ensuing!

In the beginning, it would be OK with 30. Then after 100 people, it would be a little bit taxed, maybe you got to get an outdoor facility.

Aunt Reba ain't gonna use no porta potty, that is for certain!

Can you picture 5,000?

This sitcom is getting ridiculous. A house party with 5,000 people and you only have two and a half baths? That's CRAZY.

Of course, the general assumption with a "house party" is that guests can leave when they want, and that they would not be LOCKED IN CAGES AND FORCED TO DRINK FROM THE TOILET, but then again, we don't know what kind of parties Brian Kilmeade throws or what his particular kinks are.

But anyway, Kilmeade is just so upset that people are picking on the poor CBP, because these are the BEST FACILITIES IN THE WORLD, and it's not their fault a bunch of Central Americans are showing up and forcing Donald Trump to separate their families and put the babies in jail and make the mommies drink out of the shitter.

You can have the best facilities in the world but they are so overstocked.

"Overstocked." Like they are commodities, and not people.

Six hundred and seventy thousand have come here illegally already. They had 89,000 last month. The month before, 130,000 coming illegally. They have facilities that hold hundreds, not tens of thousands. And now you are going to walk down there with the facilities that they gave, that they're not pulling out of their pocket, they're uniforms you gave them, and say the facilities are not right. They have been pleading for help. Kevin McAleenan, his predecessor, have been begging for help for months. It took a July 1st, last-minute Hail Mary just to get a meager amount of humanitarian aid. Put the border wall aside. So if you don't watch Fox, that's fine. Did you watch 60 Minutes? They did this whole feature already, how bad it was, how the Border Patrol has got to change diapers and provide material, how the National Guard has got to take over for the Border Patrol behind the desk so the press agents can go back there and pick up illegals and bring them to facilities that are overcrowded. They can't build tents fast enough. It wasn't their idea to have a wide open border. It was bad asylum rules that allowed this to happen. And then you throw it all on Border Patrol and you wonder why facilities aren't adequate.

POOR BABIES! (No, not the actual babies in the cages, the overgrown fascist shithole garbage racist human babies who work for Border Patrol.)

In short, if those Central Americans hadn't first been born, and then stupidly insisted on fleeing murder and gangs and starvation in their home countries, if they weren't so presumptive as to think the land of the free and the home of the brave might still help them during the reign of President Grand Wizard, then none of this would be happening.

GRIFF JENKINS (GUEST CO-HOST): Well that's a very important point. Look, you got to remember, the comparison to the concentration camp, her previous criticism, isn't fair because all the people that are in our custody came on their own accord.

Jesus fucking Christ. We've moved the goalposts so far, they're not even on the field anymore.

Kilmeade also framed the question by noting that if the Four Seasons was made to hold 4,000 people and all of a sudden they put 11,000 people in there, like OMG WHAT YOU GONNA DO? Make all the Four Seasons guests sleep on the floor without blankets and make them drink from the toilet and refuse to let them leave, and then have a pissing contest about whether it's offensive to refer to the Four Seasons as a "hotel," we guess.

The headlines on this story are almost all bad and miss the point, because they're focusing on Kilmeade's very stupid analogy to house parties, which makes it sound like he was being a heartless abscess in the spirit of Laura Ingraham, comparing Trump's baby jails to summer camps. He was being a heartless abscess in an entirely different way, making a very stupid analogy, because he is a very stupid person, in order to make his real point, which is that somehow we shouldn't blame the guards at the concentration camp, because none of this would have ever happened if Hitler's Germany didn't insist on having SO. MANY. JEWS!

Ocasio-Cortez responded to Kilmeade:

And the dumbfuck tried to respond right back to her about "unverified stories" and "OBAMA DIVIDERS," and he whined some more about the concentration camp guards' feelings:

And that is the America we live in right now.

It didn't even take three full years of an illegitimate and unelected authoritarian presidency for us to get here. Not even three fucking years.

[Media Matters]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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