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Cambridge, Mass, Votes To Protect Against Conspiracy To Sap And Impurify Precious Bodily Fluids

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Hey there, blue staters and donkey humpers! Bet you feel pretty darn good about yourselves, what with yer commitment to peer-reviewed science and yer dismissal of crackpot conspiracy theories! Bet you laugh every time Yr Wonkette talks about people in Arizona and Georgia who are afraid of chemtrails! Well climb on down off that high horse, dipshit, because Cambridge, Massachusetts -- a city with two of the finest research institutions on the planet, a city that gave 85.7% of its vote to Barack Obama in 2012 -- is now asking its city manager to look into this whole fluoridated water thing to find out what's REALLY going on.


The City Council last week passed a policy order requesting the City Manager look into the "the risks and benefits of the effects of continuing to fluoridate the city's water supply." [...] As submitted by Councilor Nadeem Mazen, the order asked that the City report on the "possible harms" of water fluoridation.

Mazen's original draft order went even further, according to Cambridge City Council watcher Robert Winters. It included this line, which was struck from the order that actually passed.

WHEREAS: Fluoridation is causing millions of children to develop dental fluorosis, a discoloration of the teeth that is caused by excessive fluoride intake

COME ON, Cambridge, you're better than this. You are better than this, right, Cambridge?

Full disclosure: Yr Wonkette once worked for Cambridge City Councillor Tim Toomey. Did Councillor Toomey, our old boss, vote for this ridiculous, taxpayer-funded look into a roundly discredited conspiracy theory??

HELL NO HE DID NOT! Our old boss did not vote to investigate the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids, because our old boss is cool and not a crazy person. TIM TOOMEY #1!

Go home, Cambridge, you're drunk off mind-control chemicals.

[Saul Tannenbaum]

Follow Dan on Twitter, a social media platform he first became aware of during the physical act of love.

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