Confused Republican Senator Continues To Insist He's President of America

• A certain newbie senator is still running his mouth off about how he isnotgoing to allow the president to act in his authority as president because he's suffering the delusion that "freshman senator" is the most powerful gig in government:

  Sen. Tom Cotton (R-Ark.), who has emerged as a key critic of the Obama administration's moves to secure a nuclear deal with Iran, vowed Friday to keep a framework agreement from materializing.

  "I'm going to do everything I can to stop these terms from becoming a final deal," Cotton said Friday on CNN's "The Lead," noting it is unclear when the deal would attempt to lift international sanctions.

  Nothing like announcing to the world that you're going to try your very best to undermine the president's administration from making a deal, years in the making, to avoid a war with Iran. But hey, that's exactly what newbie Sen. Cotton is all about, because after a few months in the Senate, he definitely knows best.

  "It was not a framework, it was just a detailed list of American concessions that is going to put Iran on the path to a nuclear weapon, whether they followed the terms...or they violate the terms," Cotton said.

  "Iran may not accept them in the first place because Iran has continued to string along our negotiators," Cotton added, noting Iranian Supreme Leader Ayatollah Khamenei would have input on the deal.

  Asked if taking military action would be preferable to the deal, Cotton said there are "lots of kinds of military action," citing military bombardment in the 1990s under then-President Clinton.

• You know what the world really needs? Another conservative "news" site:  

  Laura Ingraham's new website will be called LifeZette and will brand itself as "a cultural and political web destination for conservatives and independents," the On Media blog has learned.

  Sounds great, right? The name alone is sheer genius, whatever the hell it's supposed to mean. But wait, there's more. Sounds like it's gonna be a terrific staff so far:

  On Monday, a source told us that outgoing Daily Caller reporter Neil Munro had been tapped to serve as the site's editor. We've now confirmed that he will be the site's political editor, not it's editor-in-chief.*

•  This is a great read about condoms:  

  To illustrate his astonishment at what he’d learned about condoms, he gestured at the salt and pepper shakers and bottle of olive oil between us. “Everything on this table—these jars, these nozzles—every year they come out with a better product,” he said. “But not the condom! And I found that baffling. I couldn’t understand it. I was like, ‘I don’t get it. Why haven’t they made some crazy new design? Why is it still the same thing, and no one likes it?’"

  [Danny] Resnic decided to rectify the problem. He set out to build a better condom—one that he hoped would make protected sex feel as good as unprotected sex (a guy can dream!), and one that wouldn’t break like the one that broke on him. Resnic set aside everything he’d learned about latex condoms and tried to start from scratch, asking: What might a condom look like if it were designed with pleasure in mind, instead of mass production and profit margins? He had taken some product design classes in college, but didn’t know much about biomedical engineering. He spent years thinking, sketching, and researching patents. In 2001, Resnic bought some wood at Home Depot, carved it into a mold with a jigsaw, sanded it down, dipped it in liquid latex, and created the first prototype of his condom in his home, which was, at the time, a house boat on Marina del Rey.

•  This is probably Michelle Obama's fault:

  F.B.I. agents are on the front lines of the fight to protect the United States from Islamic terrorists, Russian hackers and Chinese spies.

  Now they have something far more personal to worry about: their waists.

  For the first time in 16 years, the F.B.I. is requiring that its agents pass a fitness test.

  “The lives of your colleagues and those you protect may well depend upon your ability to run, fight and shoot, no matter what job you hold,” James B. Comey, the F.B.I. director, said in October in an internal memo to agents that was obtained by The New York Times.

• Did you watch the beginning of the end ofMad Menon Sunday night? Our friends at Happy Nice Time People have some thoughts about the show you might enjoy reading or disagreeing with -- your choice:

  The 60s are about to be over for Don Draper. The second half of the final season of Mad Men, which will take place in 1969, premieres this Sunday, April 5. In anticipation of the finale, I’ve been binge watching the previous seasons, and it’s amazing to see how much has happened and what has changed across the years. As the end of an era approaches, let’s take a look about how far our favorite characters have come since 1960.

•  #NotAllAnts:  

  The most common species of ant found on the pavements of New York City and in cities around the world has a taste for human food — more than other ant species found primarily in parks and other green spaces, a study says.

  "The ants that live alongside us in our cities also seem to be those same species that can eat the same food that we do, and do so the most," said Clint Penick, a post-doctoral fellow at North Carolina State University and lead researcher of the study published Wednesday in the scientific journal Proceedings of the Royal Society B.