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We have good news (weed and boobs) and bad news (Dana Milbank). Which do you want first? Too bad, here's what you're getting.

  • Now that Duck Dynasty Derphead Phil Robertson is tourin' the teevee to sell his "book," we'll probably be suffering through many of his deep thoughts. Like what Jesus would say about fightin' terra-rists:

    "In this case, you either have to convert them -- which I think would be next to impossible," Robertson said. "I'm not giving up on them, but I'm just saying either convert them or kill them. One or the other." [...]

    "I'd much rather have a Bible study with all of them and show them the error of their ways and point them to Jesus Christ ... however, if it's a gunfight and a gunfight alone, if that's what they're looking for, I'm personally ready for either one," Robertson later added.

  • Berkeley's pothead hippies being all, like, compassionate and stuff:

    Beginning next August, medical marijuana dispensaries in this city will be required to donate at least 2 percent of their cannabis to low-income residents. The City Council approved the requirement this summer — unanimously no less — with the hope of making the drug, which can sell for up to $400 an ounce at dispensaries, affordable for all residents.

    But the charity cannabis mandate, which city officials believe is the first such law, provoked a swift backlash from critics who mocked it as a tie-dyed fantasy in a city already famous for liberal experiments.

    "Instead of taking steps to help the most economically vulnerable residents get out of that state, the city has said, ‘Let’s just get everybody high,’ ” said John Lovell, a lobbyist for the California Narcotic Officers’ Association.

  • Here's hoping we have learned a very important PR lesson from this:

    Malaysia Airlines has changed the wording of an online contest called "My Ultimate Bucket List" after Internet users derided the campaign as insensitive following two disasters suffered by the airline this year that claimed 537 lives.

    A bucket list commonly refers to things one wants to do or see before dying.

    Nearing six months since the unexplained loss of Flight MH370, the carrier launched the campaign asking Australian and New Zealand customers to describe in 500 words or less, "What and where would you like to tick off on your bucket list, and explain why?". The prize for 16 winners was an iPad or return tickets to Malaysia.

  • This lawyer really hates socks. And is about five years old, apparently:

    An attorney who habitually appears in court without socks faces sanctions including possible fines if he shows up without them again in one Indiana courtroom.

  • Washington Post columnist Dana Milbank -- is he supposed to be one of the liberal ones? so hard to keep them straight -- actually wrote these words:

    As National Journal’s Ron Fournier put it: [Who cares what he said? It's Ron freakin' Fournier.]

    He also wrote the word "chillax," as in, "I hope Obama’s chillax message turns out to be correct, but the happy talk is not reassuring." So yes, go ahead and burn everything to the ground.

  • Star Trek. Jeri Ryan. Boobs. You're welcome.

Your turn. Good news? Bad news? Free weed? Remember, sharing is caring.

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