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Deranged Former LA Times Writer Furious Obama Made Self-Deprecating Joke

News

Hello, former Laura Bush press secretary and also former LA Times politics blogger Andrew Malcolm! What are you mad about today? Is it that the campaign bus of history's greatest monster, Barack Obama, did not stop at a little girl's lemonade stand? No,that was last week? OK, then what? "Barack Obama actually said this," your Investors Business Daily column is titled, with patent disbelief. But WHAT? What did he actually say? Let us read to the end, past the fact that he was raised by his grandparents because his parents "chose to be absent" (ouch!), past the Trumpian bitching about Bamz's sealed school records, past how terrible he is for going to fundraisers even as he's being outraised by the Adelsons of the world two to one, past how he is "doing nothing." What, Andrew Malcolm? WHAT? What did he actually say???


Oh. Well, maybe next week Barack Obama will punch a little girl in the face. Here's hoping!

[IBD]

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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Image by Mariordo, Wikimedia Commons

In what seems like a perfectly logical move where corporations are people, MGM International Resorts is suing all the victims of the Las Vegas massacre in federal court. But don't worry -- at least the company isn't seeking damages from them for its own corporate pain and suffering! Instead, the lawsuit is a maneuver to head off liability claims related to the mass shooting last October 1, as is only right and just. All they want is what's coming to them, like immunity from damages and some ill will from consumers, which will no doubt blow over eventually.

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Do-Nothing Republicans Continue Doing Nothing About Traitor Trump

Can you keep a crook in office while not looking crooked yourself?

Russia

Monday in Helsinki, Donald Trump stood next to Russian President Vladimir Putin, the official sponsor of Trump's White House reality show, and glibly debased America and its institutions in exchange for a soccer ball, which frankly is more than his soul was ever worth. Republican leaders, defenders of liberty all, strongly condemned the president's actions. House Speaker Paul Ryan went so far as to say, "There's no place for this. [He] should apologize. That's dangerous for our society, that's dangerous for our democracy."

Sorry, no, that was a statement Ryan made when Rep. Maxine Waters suggested citizens personally let members of Trump's cabinet know how much they suck. Ryan's actual statement post-Helsinki reminded me more of the "vaguebooking" your friend posts on social media when their marriage is collapsing.

There is no question that Russia interfered in our election and continues attempts to undermine democracy here and around the world. That is not just the finding of the American intelligence community but also the House Committee on Intelligence. The president must appreciate that Russia is not our ally. There is no moral equivalence between the United States and Russia, which remains hostile to our most basic values and ideals. The United States must be focused on holding Russia accountable and putting an end to its vile attacks on democracy.

"Sometimes you realize you should've listened to your family and friends. You should trust they know what's best for you. It can turn out that your heart was wrong all along."

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