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AYO, CHICAGO AND DETROIT, tell Alexa to cancel all your meetings and make you a "calendar" with only Wonkette on it. Because we are coming to YOU, Chicago, on Wed., June 7, and YOU, Detroit, on Fri., June 9. Whatever shall we do? Wherever shall we go?


We shall do PIC-A-NICS and we shall go TO THE BEACH!

Chicago! We will be at Margaret Burroughs Beach Park, 3100 S. Lake Shore Dr., Chicago 60616. Wed., June 7, at SIX PM. (We are often a little early, if you are too!)

What you should bring: a blanket or camping chair; a snack to share; maybe your favorite sausages; something vegetarian if you are vegetarian. Beer is "not" allowed at this beach! Make of that what you will. Do not bring Chicago style pizza, as it is an abomination and you will be EJECTED like a common reporter at Gianforte HQ.

Detroit! We will see you at Belle Isle Park, Fri., June 9, SIX PM, in the open land across the road from the Giant Slide, because the nice lady on the phone says that is a good place to meet. Look, I downloaded you a map!

Belle_isle_map

If you are driving, you gotta pay $10; if you are taking the bus like a hippie, it is FREE! What to bring? The same thing as the Chicago people are bringing, except in place of "sausage" maybe bring us SHAWARMA! Or rose-water sweets! In fact, really, just bring every possible Middle Eastern dish, and be our best friend FOR EVER. Also, bring a sweater. You know how you get chilly.

Are you on the way from Montana to Chicago, like perhaps in Minot, North Dakota, or Fargo, or "Minnesota"? Email us at rebecca at wonkette dot com, for hugs and friendship!

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Ann Coulter is not impressed with Donald Trump's presumptuous plan to stop ripping babies away from their mothers and sending them to infant prison. For quite a while, Ann has been obsessively lamenting the very idea that American people even have children to "fill their lives with joy," but now (lol, "now") Ann has shifted her rage to immigrant people. Every time you watch her waving her alien-length arms around in a ritualistic frenzy over how shitty liberals are, just remember that we have already seen the emptiness of her soul laid bare. Remember that time she wanted to eat your baby because you got a tax credit?

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Screenshot- Right Wing watch via Fox News
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It's just another Wednesday in an America that snatched kids from their parents and locked them up in old Walmarts. Trump just signed an unneeded executive order ending his heinous child separation policy, but his "the bad guy mobster in a mobster movie" tactics might've had some permanent damage. What remains of the shriveled-up soul of the grand old poor-screwing Republican party has finally had enough.

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