Donald Trump Pretty Sure Bleeder Megyn Kelly Is The One Who Should Say Sorry

The true face of feminism.

Megyn Kelly is mean and bad and should be the one saying "sorry," y'all. Let's recap everything that's happened between Donald Trump, blowhard verbal diarrhea presidential candidate, and Kelly, Fox News anchor who sucks a lot but actually did a decent job moderating the first Republican debate of Fuckshow 2016:

1. Fox moderators say a mean by asking candidates to promise not to run as independents. Donald Trump can't make that promise, because he is A Asshole.

2. Megyn Kelly says an unfair question by asking Trump why he's always so gross about ladies, calling them "fat pigs" and whatnot.

3. Trump wins debate by YOOOOGE margins.

4. Trump says Kelly only asked all the mean questions because she had "blood coming out of her whatever" at the time, but come on, only a pervert would think he was talking about her vagina, since the monthly nosebleed is obviously what makes ladies cranky.

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5. This is a "bridge too far" for Erick Erickson, who is knownasafeminist. Erickson disinvites Trump from Dumbass Summit in Georgia, makes love to Jeb! Bush with his tongue. This had absolutely nothing to do with how the Powers That Be have decided Trump is toxic and must be dealt with, and everything to do with how Republicans just can't stand it when people say mean sexist things about ladies.

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6. So of course, now it is time for Megyn Kelly to apologize for all her nose-vagina-whatever bleeding, which led her to ask bad questions to Donald Trump:

Donald Trump on Monday showed no signs of slowing down or shutting up, saying he thinks Megyn Kelly should offer him an apology for asking a “stupid” and “unfair” question.

“She should really be apologizing to me, you want to know the truth. And other candidates have said that,” Trump said Monday on MSNBC’s “Morning Joe.”

In reaction to his own comments about Kelly's Nose Period, Trump asked, “Who would say such a thing? I really said nothing, because I wanted to get on to jobs and whatever the next subject was." Well, Donald Trump would say such a thing, for starters. Is it possible he doesn't remember?

Also, too, Trump LOVES to say "other candidates" or "other people he's talked to" have said he is right and everyone else is stupid. They're always calling him in secret to tell him how smart he is, how he does everything right the first time, and how he's the most beautiful human being alive.

And hey, maybe there are OTHERS who do that. And maybe when he asks "Who would say such a thing?" it's because we're all stupid and remembering Trump saying something he CLEARLY DID NOT SAY. Or maybe his "others" are hallucinations born from his own narcissistic, Trumped-up brain, and maybe he REALLY DOESN'T REMEMBER saying the blood words to the Fox lady, which would add amnesia to the list of his problems, and hey, maybe this will give America a chance to have a good conversation about mental health.

Anyway, now you are up to date on BloodGate, or whatever the kids are calling it.


Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.


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