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He loves the Muslims! His taco bowl is FULL of hummus!


You know that thing about how shit just falls out of Donald Trump's mouth? Well, back in November, when Trump called for a ban on ALL MUSLIMS entering the US and A, even Muslims who are American citizens doing vacay abroad, it was not actually a case of "shit falling out of his mouth." It was more like his spokeslady Hope Hicks was confirming these things over email, to clarify that yes, Trump means ban the Muslims, and yes, he means all Muslims.

But Wednesday on the radio show hosted by Brian Kilmeade, the very stupidest person to ever stupid on the Fox News network, Trump came out with this zinger of a bullfucking lie:

Well I assume [new London mayor Sadiq Khan] denies there is Islamic terrorism. There is Islamic radical terrorism all over the world right now. It’s a disaster what’s going on. I assume he is denying that. I assume he is like our President that’s denying it's taking place. We have a serious problem, it’s a temporary ban, it hasn’t been called for yet, nobody’s done it, this is just a suggestion until we find out what’s going on. We have radical Islamic terrorism all over the world, you can go to Paris, you can go to San Bernardino, all over the world, if they want to deny it, they can deny it, I don’t choose to deny it.

[wonkbar]<a href="http://wonkette.com/596750/donald-trump-says-no-muslims-allowed-christians-only-republicans-appalled"></a>[/wonkbar]Oh good golly, it was just a suggestion! He was just offering ideas, like when he's designing his luxurious hotels! Should we put the swimming pool on this side of the property, or should we ban an entire religious group from entering the United States? Trump dunno! He's just asking questions!

[wonkbar]<a href="http://wonkette.com/601625/new-london-mayor-not-interested-in-being-donald-trumps-token-muslim-bff-for-some-reason"></a>[/wonkbar]Trump was of course responding to how the new Muslim mayor of London, Sadiq Khan, thinks Trump is a racist, xenophobic marsupial scrotum. And Trump is dumbly fucking wrong to say he "assumes" Khan denies the existence of RADICAL ISLAMIC TERRORISM. (You have to say those words and ALL-CAPS them for it to count, #AmericaFact.)

Should we check what Khan actually said, when he was calling Donald Trump a trifling goon from whatever ring of hell the bad hair comes from?

Yes, we shall:

What I think the election showed was that actually there is no clash of civilization between Islam and the West. I am the West, I am a Londoner, I’m British, I’m of Islamic faith, Asian origin, Pakistan heritage, so whether it’s [ISIS] or these others who want to destroy our way of life and talk about the West, they’re talking about me. What better antidote to the hatred they spew than someone like me being in this position?

HMMMMM it's almost like Khan is talking about hatred and extremism, but what do we know?

Anyway, now Trump's Muslim ban is "just a suggestion." Is he losing his bigoted, bumbling asshole soul? Nah, because look what he just told The New York Times:

“You win the pennant and now you’re in the World Series — you gonna change?” Mr. Trump said. “People like the way I’m doing.”

He knows his low-information bison-romancing supporters just looooooove it when he's racist and hateful and threatens to build Mexican walls and shit. MMMMM, it's like an erection that lasts exactly four hours and they don't even have to call their doctors!

[wonkbar]<a href="http://wonkette.com/599866/elizabeth-warren-chops-off-donald-trumps-manhood-mounts-it-above-fireplace"></a>[/wonkbar]So it's all good. Shit fell out of Trump's mouth on the Fox News radio program, and he didn't mean it, HONEST. Maybe Trump's just butthurt about how Mayor Khan didn't take him up on his offer to be his #SpecialMuslimFriend. Maybe he was distracted because his phone kept going BING! BONG! and it was that mean asshole Elizabeth Warren, skullfucking him on Twitter again.

Whatever it was, he'll still #MakeAmericaGreatAgain, don't you worry, it will be yoooooge.

[Fox News Radio / New York Times]

 

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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Once upon a time... about ten years ago, a group of entirely ridiculous men burst onto the scene wearing stupid hats and telling men that wearing stupid hats and telling men that walking up to women in bars and insulting ("negging") them would get them laid. This did not last long, as women also had televisions and computers and were completely aware of these tricks as well, so when some ass came up to us in a bar and said "Hey, nice nails, are they real?" we would laugh and laugh and loudly announce "Oh my god, this guy just tried to neg me! Can you believe that shit? HEY EVERYONE, THIS GUY JUST TRIED TO NEG ME!" and then refer to him as "Mystery" the whole night.

Most of the men who tried that shit only did so a few times before realizing that it wasn't going to work, and thus moved on to other things. Perhaps things that did not involve furry hats and coming off as a huge creep. We may never know, because I would assume that those who tried it are now extremely embarrassed and would never, ever admit to this to us.

Still, there were a few men willing to eat that shit up, as well as some grifters willing to take advantage of that. Said grifters tended to be extremely misogynistic and seemed more like they were teaching men how to be as despised by women as they were than teaching them how to actually be liked by women.

Some of them, like Roosh V, a creepy weirdo who actually does live in his mom's basement, actively encouraged men to rape women who were intoxicated to the point of being obviously unable to consent.

However, even that branch of the PUA tree is wilting away. Many "self-help" style PUA forums like Nextasf and RSDnation are shutting down or have already shut down. In March, Chateau Heartiste, a batshit crazy PUA turned White Nationalist/Alt-Right blog was shut down by Wordpress. This week, rape advocate Roosh V (whom you may recall once called yours truly a "Wonkette typist/clown face, would not bang") announced that he was renouncing his PUA ways and devoting himself to Jesus. He explained to the forum he manages that he would no longer be allowing anyone to discuss premarital "fornication."

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'Baby Geniuses' star Jon Voight took to Twitter early this morning to proclaim his undying love for Donald Trump, probably because there is no one left in his life who will listen to him talk about this, or anything else, in person. In this video rant, Voight encouraged members of the Republican Party, whom he apparently thinks are the only real citizens of the United States, to stand by Donald Trump and "acknowledge the truth" that he is the best President since Abraham Lincoln.


Part ONE:

People of the Republican Party, I know you will agree with me when I say our president has our utmost respect and our love. This job is not easy. For he's battling the left and their absurd words of destruction. I've said this once and I'll say this again. That our nation has been built on the solid ground from our forefathers, and there is a moral code of duty that has been passed on from President Lincoln. I'm here today to acknowledge the truth, and I'm here today to tell you my fellow Americans that our country…

Oh no, not our absurd words of destruction!

Part DEUX:

is stronger, safer, and with more jobs because our President has made his every move correct. Don't be fooled by the political left, because we are the people of this nation that is witnessing triumph. So let us stand with our president. Let us stand up for this truth, that President Trump is the greatest president since President Lincoln.

Does Jon Voight not know there have been... other presidents? Can he name them? Because really, it does not sound like it. Does he also not know that a very big chunk of the Republican Party actually does not care very much for Abraham Lincoln? Namely those defenders of Confederate statues that Trump called "very fine people?" Also, did he intentionally diss their beloved Ronald Reagan?

Who can know? Who can even tell what he is trying to say or why he is trying to say it. He doesn't appear to have tweeted much since 2016, so I'm guessing whoever's job it was to keep him from tanking his career quit. Either that... or after filming the seventh season of Ray Donovan, he found out it's going to be canceled or his character is getting killed off or something and he is now free to be a jackass? I don't know, I haven't watched the show, although my parents are very into it and mad that I haven't watched it. Literally all I know about it is that it has something to do with Boston, because they keep mentioning that to me like it's a selling point.

It seems useless at this point to note that the people who scream their faces off about how bad it is for Hollywood celebs to support liberal causes, and how they should keep their politics to themselves, etc. etc. make a way bigger deal than normal people do whenever a Big Time Hollywood Celebrity like Jon Voight or, uh, Scott Baio, supports their cause. Mostly because they're the only ones who have elected a reality TV star and the star of Bedtime for Bonzo (who by the way, also once practically ruined a perfectly good Bette Davis movie with his bad acting. Which is not to say that Dark Victory is not fantastic and probably the best thing to watch if you want to sob your face off, but he was very bad in it.) to run the country.

But we might as well do that anyway, because it actually never stops being funny.

[Jon Voight Twitter]

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