As a lovely holiday gift for the president (not a Christmas gift; he doesn't get one), the geniuses at Dead Breitbart's Home For Creative Assholery have floated a doozy of an idea -- though only time will tell whether it's a floater or a sinker. Joel Pollak has this modest proposal: Maybe Congress could express its displeasure at the president's Illegal Unconstitutional Power Grab What Is Illegal And Unconstitutional by simply not inviting the Kenyan Usurper to sully its honorable halls with his presence for the State of the Union address next year. Genius! And next, they can tell him that he is also disinvited to their birthday party because he has Tyranny Cooties.


After all, the Constitution merely says that the president "shall from time to time give to the Congress information of the state of the union," and it doesn't mandate a speech. Pollak solemnly notes, "Throughout American history, there are examples of presidents who have sent a written report rather than giving a speech." You know, up until about 1913, when Woodrow Wilson made the annual speech a thing. Since then, only a few written reports have been delivered, the last by Jimmy Carter in 1981. Here's Pollak's super-SMRT plan:

Congress should indicate to President Obama that his presence is not welcome on Capitol Hill as long as his "executive amnesty" remains in place. The gesture would, no doubt, be perceived as rude, but it is appropriate--and would be far less jarring or uncomfortable than the hostile reception Obama would likely receive in person. In lieu of an address, Congress would offer to read aloud whatever document Obama saw fit to send through.

As far as we know, Congress has never told a president, "No you may not darken our door," not even once, although there was that dickery when John Boehner made Obama change the date of a jobs speech back in 2011, just to be a dick.

Then again, as Pollak noted, no other president has been a total dictator like Obama, either, so maybe a history-making insult is warranted -- a small price to pay for how Obama has besmirched the Constitution, you know:

Congress should refuse to offer any further legitimacy to a man who has shown that he does not take the Constitution seriously--and spare the nation the spectacle of cheers, smiles and handshakes greeting someone who has abused the public trust.

Or maybe, if Congress won't take Pollack up on that idea, they could just leave a flaming bag of dog poop on the White House porch, ring the bell, and run and hide in some bushes to watch Obama get poop on his shoe when he stomps out the fire! God knows the Secret Service wouldn't stop them.

[Breitbart / Salon]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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