Hey, remember when convicted crimer/Cheney best bud/secret Energy Task Force honcho/Enron chief Ken Lay "died" (moved to Paraguay) without ever darkening the door to his prison cell? We remember it too! We assume Jeff Skilling, Lay's patsy/aka actual CEO of Enron/not really a patsy at all really, remembers it as well and is all why didn't IIIIII move to George W. Bush's South American hideyhole? Instead, like a dummy, he let himself get sentenced to prison for 24 years for thieving the entire state of California, plus reaming Grandma Millie in the ass:

Trader 1: “They’re fucking taking all the money back from you guys? All the money you guys stole from those poor grandmothers in California?”

Trader 2: "Yeah, Grandma Millie man. But she’s the one who couldn’t figure out how to fucking vote on the butterfly ballot."

[Laughing from both sides]

Trader 1: "Yeah, now she wants her fucking money back for all the power you've charged right up, jammed right up her ass for fucking $250 a megawatt hour."

[Harder Laughing]

Stupid Grandma Millie, voting for Pat Buchanan on California's infamous butterfly ballot that elected the people who deregulated California's energy industry and then impeached Gray Davis for being governor after they deregulated California's industry! What a fucking dummy she is. She is probably a Baby Boomer or some shit.

Oh, right, so Jeff Skilling is getting 10 years shaved off his 24-year sentence, because apparently laws against "theft of honest services" are not actually laws.

In 2010, the U.S. Supreme Court heard Skilling’s appeal and agreed that his conviction was based in part on an invalid legal theory known as the “theft of honest services.”

Yep. Sounds like them.

The U.S. Court of Appeals in New Orleans reviewed his case in 2011 and determined there was enough other trial evidence to convict Skilling without the flawed theory. The appellate court upheld the verdicts against Skilling and ordered Lake to recalculate his sentence, having earlier found that sentencing guidelines were misapplied in his case.

Anyway, dude stole like $40 billion, but it is cool, because at least he did not do a science project.


Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


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