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Flighty Lindsey Graham Decides To Let Immigration Reform Happen Again

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Last year, Lindsey Graham decided to use his formal Ham Biscuit Veto, the constitutional provision that allows closeted senators to block any bill that offends their dainty self-importance, tostop immigration and climate-change reforms from happening, because he was so upset about the health care. But now Lindsey Graham has decided the immigration thing is allowed to happen again! Our grateful Mexicans thank this august man for changing his mind once again. Except because Graham's party took the House and a number of seats in the Senate, it would appear immigration reform is about as likely to happen as Lindsey Graham's millionaire boyfriend Shep Huntleigh is going to show up to whisk him away from the vile little Teabaggers.


Lindsey is joining up with the Senate's boy genius Chuck Schumer and forming a veritable DREAM TEAM of legislative talent.

And Schumer and his staff have quietly begun reaching out to some unlikely players in the Senate, including Lisa Murkowski of Alaska, who has professed a newfound freedom since winning reelection last year without the Republican Party’s help.

Meanwhile, that fucker McCain couldn't possibly stop hating Mexicans once again now that he won re-election, right?

And in one closely watched comment, Rep. Paul Ryan (R-Wis.) let it slip recently that Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) “seems to think that there’s a shot at this.” It led to a round of speculation that the McCain of the past, the senator who ushered a comprehensive bill through the chamber in 2006, might be ready to come back.

Hey hey, look who's back! John McCain has magically rediscovered the wisdom of the 2006 John McCain, the man he was before he became a bigot because he was afraid of losing to some talk-radio host.

Well, obviously Lindsey Graham needed to get this done before Lieberman left, so that he and Joe and John can dress up in their evening gowns and throw a ball to celebrate how they're basically the greatest, most powerful senators ever.

And then Graham will be raped by Marlon Brando. [Politico]

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Cripes the News has been awful lately! And so Yr Editrix suggested we find some good, positive news. Especially after we pitched writing a Wonket about this Mother Jones story on how global warming may be killing the whales, even though Donald Trump knows their prince. (Reply: "Nope. FOR SURE NOT THAT.") And so, as a reminder that a gooder world is possible and apropos of nothing at all that definitely didn't set your Editrix off on Twitter, where she has been stewing and bitching most shrillfully about the 2016 election and the 2020 election and any terrible similarities thereof and thereupon and therefore and thereto, we present a collection of videos of Elizabeth Warren yelling at big banks and calling for them to be broken up and their criminal operators to go to jail. Puppies and kittens will only get you so far, after all.

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