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Fox Feeling #Blessed That So Many Americans Work Multiple Jobs And Will Never Retire

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Recent polls are showing that one in four Americans believe they will never retire. Most normal human people would look at a statistic like that and say to themselves that that is depressing and sad and

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But normal human people will never be asked to give a hot take on anything on the Fox, would they? No, they would not. That is what people like Donald Luskin, CEO of Trendmicro, are for.

In an appearance on Fox Business' Making Money on Monday, Luskin explained to host Charles Payne that the fact that 23 percent of Americans believe they will never retire is actually a good thing, because it only means that people love working so much that they do not even want to spend their twilight years doing dumb things like bowling and fishing. Who wants to do enjoyable things when they could be working?

A fool, that's who!


Transcript:

Some people say a man is made outta mud
A poor man's made outta muscle and blood
Muscle and blood and skin and bones
A mind that's a-weak and a back that's strong

You load sixteen tons, what do you get?
Another day older and deeper in debt
Saint Peter don't you call me 'cause I can't go
I owe my soul to the company store

Whoops! So close! This is the actual transcript, via Media Matters:

CHARLES PAYNE (HOST): Well, retirement inching closer to becoming a thing of the past for a lot of Americans. In fact, a recent poll finds nearly one in four people don't expect to ever leave the workforce. This as the number of people working multiple jobs also spiking. So why are so many people financially unfit to call it quits? Well, It's up for debate. So let's ask TrendMicro CEO Donald Luskin. These kinds of polls are always around. Bank rate does some things, other folks. It is always alarming, 32% say they will retire before age 65, which might be unrealistic but 23% say never. Is that worrisome for you, Donald?

DONALD LUSKIN (TRENDMICRO CEO): Doesn't worry me personally. I guess I'm one of those people who plans never to retire. I mean, I got to tell you, what do people do when they retire? You know, how do you spend a day? I mean, is bowling that interesting? Is fishing that interesting? I happen to love my work. Why do I want to stop it? It's not like it hurts. Why would I stop it? This is great! What a great country where we have the opportunity to keep working! What a miracle where our lives are long enough and we're healthy enough and mentally alert enough so that we don't have to retire like generations before us! This is a great blessing. You should embrace it!

Yes, because obviously the vast majority of people who say they never plan to retire are CEOs who just happen to really enjoy their jobs, and not in fact poor people who are pretty certain they will never be able to afford to do so. You know, the same people who are working multiple jobs just to survive. But surely, they are just as jazzed as he is about never retiring. I mean, who wouldn't want to spend their golden years driving drunk 20-somethings around in an Uber?

And speaking of those people ...

This morning, the gang over at Fox and Friends squealed with delight over the fact that more and more people "have the opportunity" to be working two, three or four jobs, instead of just one job that pays them a wage they can actually live on. This was in response to Kamala Harris's criticism of Trump's bragging about employment numbers, noting the fact that yes, lots of people are employed, but that this is more the result of an economy where people are working a bunch of "gigs" like driving for Uber or Grubhub, but not having a real, regular, full-time job with benefits and a 401K.

Transcript, via Media Matters:

PETE HEGSETH (GUEST CO-HOST): What [Sen.] Kamala Harris [(D-CA)] says is so disingenuous. For most of my life I have worked two or three or four types of jobs or sources of income. Today you can do that more flexibly. How many people do you know who do something, and then maybe in their free time, they drive an Uber or they do something else to bring in extra cash? Thank God we live in the kind of country where we have the innovation and flexibility where you can bring in money from different places and do different things.

AINSLEY EARHARDT (CO-HOST): And I love those types of people. When I'm in an Uber and you talk to them, you get to know them, many of them do say they're doing this to make a little extra money. And then we start talking, well how much extra, do you mind if I ask, do you make a week, and it's enough to pay for their kids to take an extra swim class, this one guy told me, or it's enough to put a little bit of money aside for their kids to go to college. I love those types of people. My dad worked several jobs. If he had the opportunity to make a little extra, he would.

And probably, Ainsley, he would have preferred making "a little extra" at one job, so he did not have to work several. But that's just my guess. Unless, perhaps, your family was so incredibly unpleasant that he was not interested in spending time with you. That is a possibility.

But most people actually do want to spend time with their families. They want to be able to afford swim lessons and attend meets, too. They want to retire and go bowling or fishing or whatever it is they are personally into. They want to be able to actually enjoy their lives, not just spend their whole lives working multiple shitty part-time jobs and then die. That is stupid and depressing, and we, as humans, as Americans, deserve more than that. There is more to life than work!

If someone does, for whatever reason, truly want to work multiple jobs and never retire because that is just what they enjoy doing, or because they think that is what God wants them to do, that is fine. It shouldn't be a necessity. It shouldn't be the only way they can survive, or even just "survive plus have a few nice things now and again." It shouldn't even be the only way they can afford to send their kids to college.

I say, if Ainsley and Pete think it is so wonderful and exciting that other people can work two, three, four jobs, then they should trade jobs with said people and enjoy that wonderful opportunity themselves. I don't think anyone would notice a significant dip in quality over at Fox and Friends, were it hosted by former Lyft drivers. In fact, it would probably suck a lot less than it does now.

[Media Matters]

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Robyn Pennacchia

Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Previously, she was a Senior Staff Writer at Death & Taxes, and Assistant Editor at The Frisky (RIP). Currently, she writes for Wonkette, Friendly Atheist, Quartz and other sites. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse

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