Georgia Republicans Want To Gay-Bang The Gays With Exciting New Religious Freedom Laws
Those gopher mole beaver creatures just want their religious freedom!
People who love using cute sayings (like your mom) always say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. That's a good saying for this one dildo-wit Republican state senator in Georgia, name of Josh McKoon.
[contextly_sidebar id="Uz8qKlYXIQaQpmfkLnsU6gcDyV4dlVj4"]Last year, McKoon advanced a nice Religious Freedom Restoration Act (RFRA), SB 129, intended to fuck the gays right in their religious freedom holes for the protection of Christians, but it didn't end up becoming law. Oh, it passed the state Senate, because the vote happened while the Democrats were powdering their noo-noos. But then some mean Republicans in the state House who actually didn't want to fuck the gays introduced an amendment to ensure the RFRA wouldn't be used to discriminate against people. To McKoon and pals, that was NO FAIR, so they took the bill and their toys and went home and cried a lot.
But 2016 is a new year, so BOY HOWDY AND SHITFIRE, Y'ALL, McKoon is back with the same damn bill:
SB 129, introduced by Sen. Josh McKoon (R), would prohibit the government from burdening an individual’s religious beliefs similar to the federal RFRA that was expanded by the Supreme Court’s Hobby Lobby decision. This protection would be used to circumvent local laws across the state that prohibit discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity; for example, a wedding vendor who refuses to serve a same-sex couple could claim that doing so burdens her religious liberty.
[contextly_sidebar id="8DCoHn89vevB1X8O1cJBkuQ495W0ttGf"]As we explained the first time Sen. McKoon waved his religious freedom wang around in public, his bill would create one of the most insane RFRAs in all the land, even allowing for men to beat their wives on their bottoms and their faces, as long as they promised they did it for Jesus. But wait there's more!
Restaurants could refuse to serve gay or interracial couples, city clerks could refuse to marry interfaith couples, hotels could keep out Jews, housing developments could keep out black people (Genesis 9:18-27), pharmacies could refuse to dispense birth control, banquet halls could turn away gay weddings, schools could specifically allow anti-gay bullying, and employers could fire anyone for any “religious” reason.
How nice, for the white Christians McKoon is trying to protect!
Now, in case you are wondering why those dumb terrible Republicans in the state House broked the bill the first time, by making sure it wasn't used to hate the gays, it's useful to remember that the intergalactic kerfuffle over Indiana's Fuck The Gays law had just happened, which made the other states a bit pee-shy when it came to pissing all over the gay-lesbo-trans-formers. Indiana corporations got all wee-weed up at the time, because they knew that being dicks to gays is bad for business. And big fuckin' surprise, but Think Progress reports Georgia corporations like Homo Depot, the Atlanta Hawks and others have similarly condemned McKoon's bill.
And wouldn't you know it, but three Christ-hating Georgia Republican lawmakers have already said that McKoon's current bill had better have "Be Nice To Gays" exemptions carved out, just like last year. That will probably make McKoon and his band of wingnut pube-rockets mad again, hopefully mad enough to murder their dumb bill once and for all.
But oh haha, Think Progress reports that ANOTHER Georgia state senator has a dumbass bill of HIS OWN, just in case:
In 2016, SB 129 will not be alone. Sen. Greg Kirk (R), a former Southern Baptist pastor, is planning to introduce a companion bill similarly intended to enable discrimination.
Great. Just great. We're going to be playing Whack-A-Mole with these butt herpes-Americans for a long time, y'all. Aren't you excited? Or itchy? One of the two probably.
Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.
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