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Hot Upcoming Kevin Sorbo/Dean Cain Flick 'God's Not Dead' Brings Your Angry Uncle's Email Forwards To Life

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Good Christ it must suck to be the kind of Jesus-y person that only wants to consume media that is evangelical-generated and approved, because it means you get stuck with movie dreck like God's Not Dead. This heartwarming tale of sticking it to your evil atheist college professors is theoretically named after a song by the Newsboys, which brings to mind the illustrious movie/song hybrid classic "Convoy."

But this movie, hitting theaters in March 2014, has an EVEN WORSE origin story than a really bad Christian rock song. This movie is basically a two-hour version of one of those emails that your angry uncle -- you know the one? hates taxes and the poors and Obummer, loves Fox News and Jesus except for the part where Jesus was humble and impoverished -- sends you no matter how many times you tell him to stop, and it always flogs the same tired variations on the same incredibly exhausted themes.

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Last week, Nicole Arteaga of Peoria, Arizona received the devastating news from her doctor that her baby's development had stopped and that pregnancy would end in a miscarriage. Given the option of either a D&C or prescription medication, she chose to go with the prescription. Then, like all normal people do when they get a prescription, she went to a pharmacy to have it filled.

Unfortunately for her, Brian Hrenuic -- the pharmacist at the Walgreens she went to -- refused to give her that prescription, because he opposed it on "moral grounds."

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When the Trump administration starting taking migrant children at the border like it was a lending library, there were concerns they'd be used as leverage against their parents. This probably was because people close to Donald Trump kept saying out loud that the intent was to use them as leverage.

Trump has since heroically stopped (somewhat) doing the cruel thing he was doing. He's now moved on to an entirely new cruel thing. The former "Apprentice" host wants to add some reality TV game show spice to the immigration dilemma: Parents caught crossing the border illegally can either remain detained with their kids in a sweltering tent city or give up custody of the child, to be cared for by a hopefully nice person and maybe someday seen again. We call it "Sophist's Choice."

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