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Goodbye Anusburger, Hello Fecesburger!

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Unsatisfied with a diet of subsidized-corn subsidized-oil subsidized industrial cattle farm e.coli anusburgers? Japan's wacky scientists have a treat for you!


It's being called the "poop burger". Japanese scientists have found a way to create artificial meat from sewage containing human feces.

Mitsuyuki Ikeda, a researcher from the Okayama Laboratory, has developed steaks based on proteins from human excrement. Tokyo Sewage approached the scientist because of an overabundance of sewage mud. They asked him to explore the possible uses of the sewage and Ikeda found that the mud contained a great deal of protein because of all the bacteria.

Is the entire north of Japan still radioactive, from those melting nuke reactors that continue to melt down, forever? Maybe the scientists could work on that waste. [Digital Trends]

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Last night, news broke that started to answer a few of the questions we've all been asking: "WHERE ARE THE GIRLS? WHERE ARE THE BABIES? WHERE ARE THE TODDLERS?" We still don't have all the answers to those questions, by any means, and we still don't have all the pictures and video footage Americans need to truly grasp what's going on -- because the Trump administration won't give journalists access -- but we now know thanks to reporting from the AP that the youngest, most fragile children ripped from their parents at border crossings are being held in "tender age" shelters, because doesn't that sound nice? It's like jail, but for babies! Baby jails!

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What in the world is the Old Dotard on about now? Oh, Canadian Shoe Smugglers? Fair enough.

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