GOP Convention Rager Wrecks Brand New Rose Garden, Trump Distracts Press By Wrecking America

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The metaphors are coming in thick this morning. The Washington Post reports that the White House Rose Garden and South Lawn are undergoing repairs after being damaged by last month's Hatch Act Covidpalooza GOP Convention.

By sheer coincidence, the Rose Garden renovations spearheaded by the First Lady were completed just in time for the party. Also by sheer coincidence, the taxpayer-funded work included wiring for sound and audio used by Melania during her convention speech. Cool timing!

Unfortunately, despite the RNC laying turf over it, the new grass was damaged anyway by the chairs and AV equipment erected to pipe Melon's forgettable murmurings to a bored nation, as CNN was first to note.


On the South Lawn where Trump gave his interminable acceptance speech, the damage was even more extensive. The thin layer of protective turf draped across the grass was no match for a heavy stage, massive speakers, and huge screens flanking the 1,500 chairs crammed close together for maximum droplet density.

So the sod on both the South Lawn and the Rose Garden have to be replaced, although White House spokesperson Judd Deere assures us that it's being done "at no cost to taxpayers," and hastens to add that "there has been other planned infrastructure work taking place on the south grounds."

Leave aside for a moment that Republicans would have burned the country down if Obama had commandeered the people's house for the Democratic convention and wrecked the lawn. They'd have impeached him in both houses by close of business the next day. But anyway! What's with all the weasel words about "planned infrastructure work"? Is it Infrastructure Week again?

Lol, no. It's Cover Up Embarrassing Shit Week. Again, and always. The Post notes that reporters have been shunted from location to location for briefings, as "White House staff members have kept journalists covering events there from seeing the work underway in the Rose Garden and on the South Lawn by using alternative venues." Alternative venues for alternative facts? Because Trump's crack comms team thought that reporters who've worked at the White House for years just wouldn't notice that they were being parked on Pennsylvania Avenue? They'd just think the president felt like driving to Andrews Air Force Base instead of taking Marine One, which can't land on the South Lawn until the new sod is in?

Spoiler Alert: They noticed.

So now the White House is copping to the damage caused by Trump's convention, although it refuses to say how much the repairs will cost and insists that the RNC is picking up the bill. Safe bet it's less than they would have paid to host the convention somewhere other than the people's house, though.

In summary, these trashy people need to get the hell off our lawn. VOTE!

[WaPo / CNN]

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Liz Dye

Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.

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