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GOP Has New Plan To Keep Department Of Homeland Security Open, Just Kidding

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Hey, Congress, you fellas all tanned, ready, and rested after that well-deserved vacation you took last week just because you guys sure do love vacation? Great, maybe you can get back to the business of doing your job and figuring out how to keep the Department of Homeland Security up and running, since funding expires this week. Sorry that didn't solve itself while you were on vacay!


Oh, what's this? You do have a new plan to keep our homeland secure? Terrific!

In a testament to the party's struggles, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY) has teed up a procedural vote Monday afternoon on the same bill that Democrats have successfully filibustered three different times. The bill, passed by the House, overturns Obama's immigration initiatives dating back to 2011. Senate Democrats intend to filibuster it a fourth time.

Ah, so never mind then. The new plan is the old plan, which has already failed three times, but maybe it'll work the fourth time? Funny how Republicans are convinced that if they keep trying to do the same thing over and over and 40 or 50 times more over again, it will work eventually. (Cough repeal Obamacare cough cough.)

We know, we know -- it's all the Democrats' fault because they won't "get off their ass" and support a bill that is tied to telling President Obama what a naughty president he is for not hating immigrants. Such jerks, those obstructionist Democrats, and also too Obama, UGH and ARGHHHH.

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Fortunately, Congress has almost five whole days to figure something out, and since Majority Leader McConnell has sworn he will show all of America how a real leader leads, and there will be no government shutdowns on his watch, no sir, we can expect Republicans to work with Democrats to pass a bill the president will not veto before our entire national security is compromised because Republicans are hell-bent on making A Statement.

Of course, if they fail to come up with a better plan than "Hey, Democrats, will you pass our bill you already said no to this time?" Americans have let it be known they will be quite displeased if DHS is in any way undermined because that would probably be a bad thing, and oh, they know exactly who is to blame if that happens. Hint: It's not the Democrats.

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Best of luck with that, GOP. Y'all are doing a great job of showing us what True Leadership looks like so far.

[TPM]

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