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Trump has to be more careful about those retweets


Heidi Cruz would like to tell all you people that Ted Cruz is not the Zodiac Killer. Then again, that's exactly what you'd expect the wife of the Zodiac Killer to say, now isn't it? It's not like she's going to come out and admit it.

In a Yahoo News piece inspired by Larry Wilmore's riffs at the White House Correspondents' Dinner Saturday, Mrs. Cruz responded to the internet meme and insisted she knows of no serial killing in her husband's past:

“Well, I’ve been married to him for 15 years, and I know pretty well who he is, so it doesn’t bother me at all. There’s a lot of garbage out there,” Heidi said.

We would simply like to point out that this proves nothing. Bernie Madoff's wife had no idea what he was up to, either. But because this is the 2016 presidential campaign, Yahoo was careful to point out that it is all the result of an internet meme anyway:

There is a popular Internet meme where people have asked whether Ted Cruz is the infamous Zodiac Killer, who was responsible for a string of unsolved murders and taunting letters to law enforcement in California during the late 1960s and early ’70s. This meme has spread widely, even though Cruz was born in 1970, two years after the first killings took place and is most definitely not the Zodiac Killer

Look, Yahoo, you aren't going to go convincing people with weak facts like that. Not in a world where significant portions of the electorate believe Barack Obama is a foreign-born Muslim who is actively working to destroy America, that astrology is real, or that humans and dinosaurs lived at the same time. Besides, some of the evidence is so compelling!

To their credit, Yahoo apparently didn't originally plan to ask Heidi Cruz about the Zodiac Killer thing; it simply arose sort of organically while they were covering her:

Yahoo News asked Heidi about his remarks after a pair of supporters she met with marveled at her ability to “deal with” the “smearing and the scorched-earth stuff going on” during this heated GOP primary.

“Well, it’s amazing how a lot of people are swayed by it,” Heidi said. “Part of it is, the news media is 24/7, and they don’t let up.”

Huh. Well, now we're going to have to ask Heidi Cruz for a citation -- we're fairly certain that the chances anyone really believes Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer, or would "be swayed" by an internet meme about it, are roughly equal to the possibility that Ted Cruz actually is the Zodiac Killer.

Or maybe Heidi Cruz was simply acknowledging, as obliquely as humanly possible, that her husband is such a creepy dude it's no surprise people might joke about him being a serial killer. It has to be hard being married to a guy so many people simply can't stand.

[Yahoo News]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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Hello! Here a beautiful open thread for you to not comment all over, so that you don't not comment all over Dok's book club post.

I was gonna drop my Nonnie's recipe for Easter bread in here, but apparently it has to proof overnight and is also for approximately 87,000 people, so not much of a point to that! (Though here it is if you really want it. She doesn't do the egg thing, but if you want, you can put some dyed raw eggs in the braided dough before you bake. And you can add sprinkles, and anise if you're gross and like gross things) I was gonna try and make it myself last night, but have instead opted to just make waffles. Waffles are FINE.

So instead, I shall just leave you with this absolutely terrifying version of The Velveteen Rabbit starring Marie Osmond as said velveteen rabbit. Coincidentally, Marie Osmond is also Nonnie's 2nd arch-nemesis, after Rachel Ray (Rachel Ray because she doesn't pull her hair back when she cooks, and Marie for reasons I'm not entirely clear on but which I believe are related to a Weight Watchers commercial).

THE VELVETEEN RABBIT starring Marie Osmond - full length feature youtu.be


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'Unemployed men queued outside a depression soup kitchen opened in Chicago by Al Capone' -- National Archives

Happy Day Before Half-Priced Easter Chocolate Day, Wonkers! Time to wrap up our Wonkette Book Club discussion of Winter War: Hoover, Roosevelt, and the First Clash Over the New Deal, by Erich Rauchway, a historian at UC-Davis. We're increasingly convinced the book might have just as well been titled Herbert Hoover: Christ, What An Asshole! As ever, even if you haven't finished the reading, jump in anyway -- there won't be a test!

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