Here Is Your Rick Perry Mugshot And All The Other Great Ones Too
Tuesday was the day for Gov. Rick “Yosemite Sam” Perry to turn himself into the authorities for fingerprinting, mugshot-taking, and general merriment over the extremely thin felony charges he faces over defunding the Travis County Public Integrity Unit. Finally, we would have the answer to the question that has plagued us ever since the charges were announced: Glasses or No Glasses? As you can see above, Yosemite Rick went with No Glasses and a tight grimace that says “I can’t believe I have to put up with this shit,” like a businessman who got pulled over for a DUI after a couple too many bourbons at his Midland country club.
The mugshot was good for one thing, though: It got us reminiscing about some of the greatest mugshots of recent history. Let’s take a walk down memory lane, shall we?
Of course the gold standard of political figures smiling for the police cameras was set by former House Majority Whip Tom DeLay, in a pose that says “I am auditioning for a future job as a garden gnome in some Texas oil millionaire’s front yard.”
Who can forget the days of simple sex scandals, when Larry “Wide Stance” Craig solicited some gay sexxxytime in a Minneapolis airport bathroom. Craig (ahem) got off, and we got this mugshot, complete with flag pin, of a guy who looks like the deacon of a church who was just arrested for possession of child porn.
Of course no mugshot collection is complete without Ubergrupenfuhrer Gibson. Remember him? The guy who hated the Jews? Remember?
In the interest of political balance (see, Wonkette does too cover Democrats!), we give you a smiling and happy John Edwards, who probably thought he was posing for a profile pic on a dating website.
For both political and gender balance, we present the mugshot of Travis County District Attorney Rosemary Lehmberg, whose arrest on drunk driving charges last year triggered Perry’s veto threats that led to the abuse of power charges he now faces. Hi Rosemary! We remember you from that episode of Cops where you got busted for throwing empty paint cans at your husband Cletus after you caught him tomcatting around with your sister.
For our money, though, nothing beats this shot of a windblown lesbian farm wife from Nebraska.
Anyway, good luck to Gov. Perry in the Big House.