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Hey America, Your Republican 'Representatives' Are Literally Scared Of You. GOOD JOB!!

Congress

Yesterday we learned about two Republican congresstwats who either a) had to be escorted out of a town hall by the fuzz because it is scary when middle class people chant "Shame" at you (California's Tom McClintock), or were b) hiding out from their constituents and canceling town halls because they are giant pussies (Illinois's Peter Roskam).


Today, Politico informs us that the Republican caucus held an EMERGENCY OMG MEETING to let one of their colleagues, a former sheriff, explain how to NOT GET MURDERED BY ALL THE MEAN WORDS the people were saying. Let's listen in!

House Republicans during a closed-door meeting Tuesday discussed how to protect themselves and their staff from protesters storming town halls and offices in opposition to repealing Obamacare, sources in the room told POLITICO.

House GOP Conference Chairwoman Cathy McMorris Rodgers invited Rep. David Reichert, a former police sheriff, to present lawmakers with protective measures they should have in place. Among the suggestions: having a physical exit strategy at town halls, or a backdoor in congressional offices to slip out of, in case demonstrations turn violent; having local police monitor town halls; replacing any glass office door entrances with heavy doors and deadbolts; and setting up intercoms to ensure those entering congressional offices are there for appointments, not to cause chaos.

That's right, now you have to get buzzed into your congressman's office like it is Planned Parenthood! A place people actually shoot!

“The message was: One, be careful for security purposes. Watch your back. And two, be receptive. Honor the First Amendment, engage, be friendly, be nice,” said Republican Study Committee Chairman Mark Walker (R-N.C.). “Because it is toxic out there right now. Even some of the guys who have been around here a lot longer than I have, have never seen it to this level.”

He later added: “For those of us who have children in grade school and that kind of thing, there’s a factor in all of this, saying: How far will the progressive movement go to try to intimidate us?”

Nah dude. Liberals don't dox you or threaten your children (except for that Mild Unpleasantness in Nevada. But it's not like you're #rigging the primary for Hillary Clinton, so you should be ship-shape!). No, for the most part, those are Alex Jones listeners and Michelle Malkin.

We will say this for Politico! They included the following, like, whoa if true!

The conference discussion comes as Democratic activists around the nation ramp up protests against Republican to repeal Obamacare. Protesters have disrupted town halls and other public events, jeering and yelling at Republicans just as conservatives did to Democrats when they were writing the law eight years ago. Conservative protesters in 2009 and 2010 spat on and hurled racial epithets at Democratic lawmakers ahead of their votes to pass Obamacare.

Don't Politico know it's dogma on the Right that John Lewis totally lied about that, because "because"? Anyway, then they said this:

Last weekend, conservative Rep. Tom McClintock (R-Calif.) similarly had to be escorted out of a town hall meeting by a half-dozen police officers after the crowd turned angry.

And That's When We Clicked 'Close Tab.' Chanting "shame on you" might be "intimidating" to a common Tom McClintock, but it wasn't even accompanied by a well-aimed and rotting piece of fruit.

Anyway, the rest of the story seems to be (we did skim!) about how scary and threatening all the protesters are, and how representatives of the American people should be scared of us because we are "endangering" them and their staffs, we are pretty much constantly murdering people, it is a thing peaceful protesters just DO, okay?

I mean, it's true. You can ask Carl Sandburg:

I am the people—the mob—the crowd—the mass.

Do you know that all the great work of the world is done through me?

I am the workingman, the inventor, the maker of the world’s food and clothes.

I am the audience that witnesses history. The Napoleons come from me and the Lincolns. They die. And then I send forth more Napoleons and Lincolns.

I am the seed ground. I am a prairie that will stand for much plowing. Terrible storms pass over me. I forget. The best of me is sucked out and wasted. I forget. Everything but Death comes to me and makes me work and give up what I have. And I forget.

Sometimes I growl, shake myself and spatter a few red drops for history to remember. Then—I forget.

When I, the People, learn to remember, when I, the People, use the lessons of yesterday and no longer forget who robbed me last year, who played me for a fool—then there will be no speaker in all the world say the name: “The People,” with any fleck of a sneer in his voice or any far-off smile of derision.

The mob—the crowd—the mass—will arrive then.

I have never seen a bigger bunch of pussies in my life.

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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Cripes the News has been awful lately! And so Yr Editrix suggested we find some good, positive news. Especially after we pitched writing a Wonket about this Mother Jones story on how global warming may be killing the whales, even though Donald Trump knows their prince. (Reply: "Nope. FOR SURE NOT THAT.") And so, as a reminder that a gooder world is possible and apropos of nothing at all that definitely didn't set your Editrix off on Twitter, where she has been stewing and bitching most shrillfully about the 2016 election and the 2020 election and any terrible similarities thereof and thereupon and therefore and thereto, we present a collection of videos of Elizabeth Warren yelling at big banks and calling for them to be broken up and their criminal operators to go to jail. Puppies and kittens will only get you so far, after all.

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