Hands where we can see them, creep.

Once upon a time in a Congress far away, there was this gaymosexual congressman named Mark Foley from a state called "Florida." He got in big trouble mister because he liked to send sexxxytime emails and Myspace messages to 16-year-old boy congressional pages, and it was even more scandalous because Foley had a nice, long record of voting for anti-gay legislation. HYPOCRITE. Anyway, he resigned in 2006 for being a gross perv.

What's hilarious about this is that Foley was sitting behind Donald Trump at a Florida rally Wednesday, while Trump made word soup about how TERRIBLE AWFUL BAD it is that Orlando shooter Omar Mateen's dad was spotted sitting behind Hillary at a rally. Trump says that people whose white privilege extends to sitting behind him and gazing at his beautiful gluteus maximus during rallies is a pretty good indicator that those people KNOW HIM. Otherwise, how would they have gotten those seats? Therefore Omar Mateen's dad and Hillary Clinton are sittin' in a tree, probably lesbian sexing each other and doing terrorism:


When you get those seats, you sort of know the campaign. So when [Hillary] said, "Well, we didn't know ..." He knew! They knew [...]

49 people killed. Other people will never ever ever be the same. And that guy is sitting back there -- and of course he likes Hillary! Because Hillary won't even say the words "radical Islamic terrorism."

Yadda yadda, go fuck yourself, Donald Trump. The absolute dregs of society -- neo-Nazis, white supremacists, Scott Baio -- support Trump, so we really don't feel like we need to get into a pissing contest over whose supporters are worse.

[wonkbar]<a href=""></a>[/wonkbar]Now, we YELLED AND SCREAMED at CNN for being such bad journalists and spending an entire afternoon focusing on Mateen's presence at Hillary's rally. And why? Because the campaign said very clearly, with words small enough even CNN and Donald Trump could understand them, that they didn't know daddy Mateen was there, didn't invite him, and that they don't even want his support.

So why are we talking about Mark Foley sitting behind Donald Trump, probably playing pocket pool with his penis during a Trump rally? Are we a big hypocrite who is just in the tank for Hillary, or do we have a goddamn point? Why, yes, we DO have a goddamn point. You see, as The New Civil Rights Movement explains, Donald Trump does know Mark Foley. He gave Foley many moneys, when he was in Congress!

Foley told NBC News' Thomas Roberts Wednesday night that he indeed was siting behind Trump at the rally and that he is a Trump supporter. Not only that, but Foley revealed that Trump was a Foley supporter.

"He's been a friend of mine for 30 years and one of my biggest contributors," Foley told Roberts via text. Later, in an interview with the Sun-Sentinel, Foley said, "I've been a friend of Mr. Trump's since 1987. I've admired so much of what he's done. He's a different breed of leader and a different breed of candidate."

It's gross when Mark Foley uses the word "breed."

Anyway, here is a picture of some Trump donations to Foley, from the Tweeter:

[wonkbar]<a href=""></a>[/wonkbar]Now look, we are not saying that Mark Foley's presence in the general area of Donald Trump's backside during a Trump rally means that Trump endorses sexting underage male congressional pages. How could we possibly? It's entirely possible that the only time Donald Trump is into impressionable youngsters is when they're his daughter.

The point is that Trump should answer for why Mark Foley the disgraced perv-bag is in such cahoots with him, and also tell us if he's too stupid to understand why that's hilarious and pathetic.

And if Trump refuses to answer for it, then Hillary should, because come on, guys, it's Crooked Hillary. She has to answer for EVERYTHING.

[The New Civil Rights Movement]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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