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Mean Hillary just laughing right in Dumbfuck's dumb face.


There are many things to be said about Monday night's great showdown between Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, which was the first of three debates, unless Trump is too big of a pussy to show up for the remaining events. He might be! So now we are in the phase where we talk it over and decide who was hot or not, and did Hillary do a good job, while Donald Trump grunted and failed? Yes, that is what happened!

People will be talking all day about their favorite moments of the debate, but we want to share our VERY favorite with you right now, and it was on the subject of Hillary Clinton's temperament. What we loved so much is that, for a candidate people accuse of being so rehearsed and scripted, she was just hilariously human, after Trump said this:

Well, I have much better judgment than she does. There's no question about that. I also have a much better temperament than she has, you know?

At that point, the audience, all American presidents, living and dead, your mom, and God and Jesus LAUGHED AT TRUMP. But he continued:

I have a much better -- she spent -- let me tell you -- she spent hundreds of millions of dollars on an advertising -- you know, they get Madison Avenue into a room, they put names -- oh, temperament, let's go after -- I think my strongest asset, maybe by far, is my temperament. I have a winning temperament. I know how to win. She does not have a ...

Trump usually speaks at a remedial third grade level, but reading this transcript, it's like watching him regress all the way back into baby-whines and dirty diapers. CONTINUED:

Wait. The AFL-CIO the other day, behind the blue screen, I don't know who you were talking to, Secretary Clinton, but you were totally out of control. I said, there's a person with a temperament that's got a problem.

Yep, that's it, and everybody knows exactly what Trump meant when he was talking about the AFL-CIO thingie, oh yeah, the whole audience was like "OH THAT'S RIGHT, HILLARY TURNED INTO AN UNHINGED GARGOYLE THAT DAY, WE HAD FORGOTTEN." Except actually nobody knew what fuck he was talking about.

Finally, Hillary had a chance to respond:

Whew! OK!

At that point Hillary Clinton giggled, smiled all genuine, and involuntarily did a little dance, probably because she has secret Parkinson's that she's hiding from the American public. JUST KIDDING, it was because Trump is a ginormous fuck-up and she was genuinely giggle-dancing. See for yourself:

If that 57-second video is too long for you and you just want to see Hillary do her little dance, here is another video:

Doesn't that make you SO HAPPY? It makes us so happy, and that's why it's our favorite moment of the debate.

Of course, Hillary Clinton's campaign has already released an ad mocking all this, just featuring moments from last night:

You want runners-up, of other debate moments that were ALMOST our favorite? OK, the second runner-up was when Trump lost what few remaining marbles he has at Lester Holt, who dared to fact-check Trump's completely debunked claim that he was against the Iraq War from the start. Trump started crying like a man-baby about "CALL SEAN HANNITY!" and the whole universe was like "Fuck that loser Sean Hannity."

The first runner-up was when Hillz said this:

I think Donald just criticized me for preparing for this debate. And, yes, I did. And you know what else I prepared for? I prepared to be president. And I think that's a good thing.

ZING! Hillary Clinton rules, Donald Trump drools, THE END.

[debate transcript via Washington Post]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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