Homeland Security Might Abandon Rainbow Terror Alerts
The Homeland Security Department is proposing to discontinue the color-coded terror alert system that became a symbol of the country's post-9/11 jitters and the butt of late-night talk show jokes.
The 8-year-old system, with its rainbow of five colors - from green, signifying a low threat, to red, meaning severe - became a fixture in airports, government buildings and on newscasts. Over the past four years, millions of travelers have begun and ended their trips to the sound of airport recordings warning that the threat level is orange.
You don't like being groped or blasted with cancerous porn-rays every time you enter an airport? Fine, the TSA will stop shouting ORANGE IS TODAY'S TERROR COLOR! every five seconds. Good compromise. [ AP ]
"The Transportation Security Administration informs you that the current threat level is a sort of beigey-creamish color, lighter than sandstone but darker than, say, parchment or even oatmeal. Report suspicious activity or untended items to one of the people in the uniforms that are somewhere between a Prussian blue and a really dark shade of blueberry."
Pretty sure the new system will indicate how far into your body the search will be conducted.
Low = visual as is elevated = visual, but coats, hats, etc removed medium = pat down high = naked (you, not TSA) pat down extreme = fisting