Herschel Walker: I'm Not Smrt Enough To Debate Raphael Warnock's Fancy Preacher Suits

Herschel Walker: I'm Not Smrt Enough To Debate Raphael Warnock's Fancy Preacher Suits

Hey, y’all, Herschel Walker’s running for the US Senate! Yes, it’s still true, and Savannah Now reports that Walker's amping up his game. He's "added experienced advisors from Washington to help beef up his campaign presence, minimize the missteps, and silence critics who are skeptical of his character."

This is all normal Senate campaign stuff less than two months before the election. You can see how well it's working based on what Walker said to the press during a trip to Savannah last week:

WALKER: I am getting out talking to people and talking to you (referring to the media).

Walker is aware of himself and his surroundings. He's aced at least two of the qualifications for sentience. There's no stopping him now.

On October 14, Georgia voters will finally see Walker and incumbent Democratic Sen. Raphael Warnock debate the issues that concern them. I mean, Warnock will definitely discuss relevant issues, and Walker will regurgitate garbled rightwing talking points. He's already lowering expectations for the debate, which I don't think is his way of luring Warnock into a false sense of security. He's just that stupid. It's the classic dope-a-dope maneuver.


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Walker said (for real, we promise):

I’m a country boy. I’m not that smart. He’s a preacher. (Warnock) is smart and wears these nice suits.

This is the second Senate race post this week that’s addressed the candidates’ sartorial choices. First off, we can assume Walker has some nice suits. He boasts an estimated net worth of between $29 and $65 million and earned $4 million in income last year. Warnock, a pastor, is worth between $554,000 and $1.3 million. Walker isn't the working-class candidate just because he probably needs a crib sheet to spell his own name.

So, he is going to show up and embarrass me at the debate Oct. 14, and I’m just waiting to show up and I will do my best.

Now that's just pathetic. Not even weak, stepped over Corleone son Fredo went around telling people he wasn’t smart. Quite the opposite. During a famous scene, he declared, “I can handle things! I'm smart! Not like everybody says ... like dumb... I'm smart and I want respect!”


But Walker doesn’t want Georgians respect, just their vote. He’s not like Donald Trump, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and Lauren Boebert, who all have the combined IQ of lint, but they would never admit they’re not smart. While they are overtly anti-intellectual and embrace their own priggish ignorance, they present themselves as wiser than the so-called elite. No, when Walker admits he’s stupid, he’s appealing to white Republican voters who resent how Barack Obama, Stacey Abrams, and Ketanji Brown Jackson upset their preferred racial hierarchy and are obviously their intellectual superior.

Walker lied some more to reporters about why it took so long to schedule a debate.

[Warnock] has made every excuse not to show up. I begged him until I chased him down and then he decided he was going to show up Oct. 14.

I didn’t agree to do his debate because it wasn’t fair. A fair debate is doing it in front of the voters, and I’ve agreed.

Walker might prefer a debate in front of voters but that doesn’t make it any fairer than any other type of debate. This is not a sitcom where you can trust the laughs more if it’s filmed in front of a live studio audience.

Adam Van Brimmer at Savannah Now claims that Walker "did a smart thing last week in publicly stating “I’m not that smart." He said it was a "savvy move" because Walker can't compete with Warnock on a "policy and issue discussion," so the "best Walker can hope for in debating Warnock is to connect with voters on an emotional level."

Here's a sample of Walker's "emotional" pitch to voters.

I'm more than just a football player. What I'm doing now is moving forward by talking to the voters, because that's what really counts and let them know what I stand for. I was a great football player, but I will be a better senator because I represent the people.

The race is neck and neck. And what I have to do is continue to get out and meet people, which is what I'm doing here.

Look at Walker demonstrating his own self-awareness again. He's a fully sentient Senate candidate! Yet, Warnock is still pulling ahead in some polls. It's as if voters expect a little more. Thank God.

[Savannah Now]

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. Once, he wrote a novel called “Mahogany Slade,” which you should read or at least buy. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."


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