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It's A Good Thing Bradlee Dean Isn't Being Sexist About Judge Who Awarded Rachel Maddow Attorneys Fees

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Oh, Bradlee Dean, don't ever stop being you! And more importantly, please keep Larry Klayman, founder ofJudicialWatch and FreedomWatch -- a not at all crazy person seen here discussing a Citizens Grand Jury to indict Supreme Court justices John Roberts and Elena Kagan -- as your personal attorney forever and ever. Maybe a sitcom? At the very least a road movie.


You all remember Bradlee Dean from such public-school-assembly heavy-metal hip-hop hits as "Don't Have Mud On Your Wedding Dress" and "No Homo (No, Really, No Homo)." You also remember he sued Rachel Maddow for the piddling amount of $50 million for having played clips of his own radio show on her show, and thus defaming him, by saying what he said. Well! Since yesterday, when some broad ordered him to pay attorneys fees to Rachel Maddow (and to the since-defunct Minnesota Independent), Dean and his attorney Klayman have filed a real witch-burner of a motion! And that motion says that the judge is like "a woman scorned."

First, Klayman spends about 175 paragraphs bitching that Judge Joan Zeldon called Maddow's attorneys "distinguished" but did not call him "distinguished." Like, seriously, so many paragraphs. Then it explains Judge Zeldon just mad because they filed in federal court instead of in her court, because DC has an anti-Slapp law.

That's weird how they went with "woman scorned" instead of the more obvious "bitch be hysterical, because the rag." Guess they were too gentlemanly to just say the truth!

[Scribd/TPM]

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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Photo by Wonkette Operative 'Teecha'

If it's Sunday, this must be Nice Things, our weekly escape from the quotidian awfulness. Our featured doggo this week comes via a photo by Wonkette reader "Teecha," and we don't think Teecha mentioned a name for this lovely old rescue dog. If it is a dog at all: I think it may actually be one of Sia's more inventive disguises, like that time she was a little pony.

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The producers of your favorite live-action Jack Chick pamphlet, "God's Not Dead" -- you know, the one where the Hercules dude plays an evil philosophy professor who tells all of his students on the first day that they are no longer allowed to believe in god? As all secular professors do? -- have come out with a thrilling new movie, all about how abortion is bad or whatever.

The movie tells the "true" story of Abby Johnson, a former Planned Parenthood clinic worker turned professional anti-choicer. Johnson has been a darling of the forced birth circuit ever since she made up ridiculous and provably false reasons for quitting the Planned Parenthood that was about to fire her for being bad at her job.

Basically, she claims that Planned Parenthood was pushing her to make more abortions happen so they could reel in more dough, and also that she witnessed (for the first time ever!) an ultrasound-guided abortion and saw the baby move from the light and then immediately realized that what she was doing was wrong.

The thing is, however -- no ultrasound-guided abortions were performed on the day she said it happened, and the only reason there was an uptick in abortions at her clinic was because they started offering the abortion pill on a daily basis (and had previously only been performing surgical abortions every other Saturday).

As you may have guessed, the movie does not address any of these things. It also looks very, very bad.

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