Ivanka Trump Says #TIMESUP For Sexual Predators Who Aren't Currently Her Dad
Did everybody see the big speech Oprah Winfrey made at the Golden Globes? It was inspiring! It was empowering! She said TIME'S UP for people who don't listen to women who speak up about the harassment they've dealt with at the hands of powerful men! In the aftermath of the speech, Winfrey was crowned the Democratic presidential nominee for 2020, haha just kidding no she wasn't, we only typed that to annoy people who are being way too serious about whether or not Oprah Winfrey is running for president in the year 2020, considering how it is JANUARY 9, 2018, AT THE MOMENT, AND WE HAVE MIDTERM ELECTIONS TO WIN.
Ivanka Trump watched Oprah's speech and boy howdy she liked it!
YEAH! That's right, Ivanka Trump, you tell 'em #TIMESUP! Start by telling YOUR DAD!
Because remember how umpteen women have accused Donald Trump of sexual harassment and unwanted groping and assault? It would be just super if Ivanka Trump did her part to #ThinkGlobally but #ActLocally with the #MeToo movement, by telling her dad #TIMESUP on his shitty, failed presidency, because of all the credible abuse allegations against him! After all, Harvey Weinstein is no longer working. Matt Lauer is no longer working. (Because to be clear, the Trump accusations are somewhere between Weinstein and Lauer, when it comes to how many women and what he allegedly did to them.)
Alyssa Milano, who is not here for this shit, had another idea for Vanky:
Back when Wonkette wrote its viral masterpiece, "Oh Go Fuck Yourself, Ivanka Trump," we noted that Ivanka Trump, Famous Feminist, actually has not done shit in her position in her grab-ass father's administration to stop him from shitting all over women and their reproductive rights and whatnot. And she sure hasn't gotten that increased paid family leave she loves to talk about. But that was before the #MeToo movement started. Maybe this is her chance to do something!
So go for it, Ivanka! The zeitgeist demands it! Standing up for women in the face of your trashbag of a father would be a great way to kick off your presidential run, because didn't Michael Wolff's book say you and Jare-Bear have an "agreement" that says you get to "be president" before he "gets to be president"? Right, that thing! We promise, you will definitely get to be president and we will definitely respect you like we respect Oprah if you make your dad resign, or at least speak out forcefully against his disgusting behavior. (Wink wink nudge nudge!)
What's that, Ivanka Trump? You hear our valid criticisms and choose to remain #complicit instead, because of your thirst for power? Well fuck you then.
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