James O'Keefe Takes Al-Qaeda Cosplay Fantasies To Mexico Border To Prove Something, We Guess
Since last week we had been hearing rumblings on the Internet that smirking dildo boat enthusiast James O’Keefe III had a new video that would SHOCK EVERYONE and CHANGE THE GAME (mostly we were hearing this from O’Keefe’s Twitter feed, but we’re suckers for hype). Just yesterday Gavin McInnes, who is literally a bag of farts, promised us that he was “not exaggerating” when he said the new video “might be the most embarrassing thing to happen on Obama’s watch.” More embarrassing than the IRS or Fast & Furious or all the czars or losing Iraq or BENGHAAAAAAZI? We’ll be the judge of that!
So here is James O’Keefe’s new video, and we are happy to say that McInnes is right, this is the most embarrassing thing to happen on Obama’s watch! It’s just much more embarrassing for O’Keefe, who goes to the ass end of Texas, finds a particularly narrow and isolated stretch of the Rio Grande, and wades across it to prove just how easy it is for migrants to cross the border. And if a preppy guy in Topsiders who flew to the border just to cross it can do it, imagine how easy it must be for poor dehydrated Hondurans who have spent weeks running a gauntlet of criminals, the Mexican army and punishing desert heat to reach that point can do so.
Scary! Who knows who is crossing the border! Could be cartel members! Could be convicted felons like James O’Keefe! But just in case you aren’t terrified enough, watch all the way to the end, when our intrepid reporter puts on an Osama bin Laden mask and wades across the Rio Grande to prove that the border is not even safe from douchey bros wearing Halloween costumes. Thanks, Obama!
Naturally, our old friend Patrick Howley of the Daily Caller is ON IT with this particularly incisive post:
This summer has seen a whirlwind of terrorist activity on the southern border, with dire anecdotes pouring out of local news stations but ignored by the mainstream press. Security contractors found a Muslim prayer rug on the Arizona border…Country music legend Charlie Daniels revealed that, “I personally spoke with an Arizona law enforcement officer who had taken four what he called ‘Taliban’ out of the back of an 18 wheeler.”
Oh yeah, the Muslim Prayer Rug/Soccer Jersey of Death. Sorry Pat, but your evidence should really be more solid than “Charlie Daniels knows a guy.”
Anyway, James O’Keefe says he spent $74,242 in expenses filming this report and would greatly appreciate you help replenish his coffers. Apparently rubber Osama bin Laden masks are pricier than we thought.