Jeb Bush Can't Remember That Unforgettable Space Shuttle Disaster He'll Never Forget
I'll never forget, it was like that time when I ... well, no, not exactly like that. But you were there. And maybe there was a dancing midget, too.
At a campaign appearance Wednesday, Jeb Bush struggled to remember a thing he said he'd never forget, only this time it had nothing to do with how his brother kept us safe from terrorism apart from the time he didn't. No, this time it was the unforgettable loss of one of those space shuttles that we lost, that one time, even though it had been right there the night before. It was awful, and seared into his memory, kind of:
It's a bit painful to watch, especially as the Concord, New Hampshire, audience tries to jump in with suggestions that are even worse:
I was thinking, you were going to bring up the tragedy that took place, I will never forget that, when I went as governor of Florida, to the tarmac for a tribute to the astronauts, that died in, I think it was 2005, wasn't it? Or Two... no, well, the -- (audience member: "Christa McAuliffe?") yeah... No, the other one, 2002. (another audience member, barely audible, gets it right: "Columbia?") In the 2000s. It was horrible, It’s a reminder that this is a dangerous endeavor, but it is worth us, for all sorts of reasons, to be engaged in it.
The Daily Banter's Tommy Christopher is pretty sure he heard someone say "You mean 'Porkins'?" but that can't be right, since that was a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away. Here on Earth, or at least a fair ways above it, the Challenger blowed up in 1986, well before Jeb Bush became governor. Apparently, Jeb didn't hear the one person who mentioned Columbia, which disintegrated during re-entry in 2003. And yes, bloggers have the luxury of looking it up, but then, as Christopher says, bloggers didn't bring it up and say that they could never forget it at a campaign town hall, now did they? Anyway, even though it was tragic, it's no reason not to, uh, to not go forth and boldly go into that good night to seek out new worlds, where wings take dream, and where no man has derped before.
As a special bonus video, here is Jeb movingly recalling the names of the Columbia astronauts, and clearly not tripping over "Kalpana Chawla" because he's seeing the mission specialist's name for the first time ever:
It's quite the honor -- first Indian-American astronaut, first Indian woman in space, and the first of two videotaped Columbia-related flubs by the Smarter Bush Brother. All told, the voters of Concord should be grateful Jeb didn't reminisce about how he always wanted to ride on the supersonic passenger plane named after their town.
Update/Correction: Due to a combination brain fart and terrible typing, we originally had the date of the Challenger disaster as "1996" when it was of course 1986. Having lived through the Reagan administration, Yr Wonkette regrets the era.
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.