waking up

HOLY SHIT, "MORNING JOE" WAS SO GOOD TODAY. Wait, come back, we are being serious!

Remember that time Trump creep Stephen Miller was all over the TV saying the president's power will NOT be questioned, and Joe and Mika suddenly came to Jesus and realized that this White House was exhibiting really creepy and autocratic behavior? This new knowledge just washed over them, and it was a sight to behold! This was kind of like that, except for this time, Joe and Mika rolled off each other after birthday sex this morning (allegedly, because it is Mika's 50th birthday) and, in that afterglow, it suddenly dawned on them that Donald Trump's mental faculties may be in steep decline. They are not saying he has dementia, they are Just Asking Questions!

At the beginning of the show, Joe shared a quote about the last day or so in Trump's America, from presidential historian Douglas Brinkley, published in Politico:

"It seems to be among the most bizarre recent 24 hours in American presidential history," said Douglas Brinkley, a presidential historian. "It was all just surreal disarray and a confused mental state from the president."

Brinkley was talking about all the insane shit that's come out of the tiny-handed president's mouth since Sunday. There was his made-up story about how Andrew Jackson wanted to stop the Civil War, from his grave. There was the thing about how Trump would be so excited and "honored" (he said that) to meet with North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un. Oh, and there was that insane interview with CBS's John Dickerson where Trump said he doesn't "stand by anything" he says, and then he mumbled gibberish about Obama's "surveillance" until he got scared and kicked Dickerson out of his office.

We're going to focus on the opening segment of the show, but all should understand that Joe and Mika came back to the subject of Trump's possibly failing mental health constantly during the three-hour broadcast. Literally every guest they had on, they asked about Trump's mental state. Toward the end of the show, in an interview with presidential historian Brinkley, Joe noted of Trump's seeming decline that "the pace is quickening." Like seriously, it was the whole show.

Here's part of that first segment, with some transcribing afterward, because we are so nice. (Click HERE for the full segment!)

JOE: ... [H]e started like "nobody's asked this question before, why did we even have a Civil War?" My mother's had dementia for 10 years. That sounds like something my mother might say today. She would say, "people don't ask that question, why did we have a Civil War?" It's beyond the realm. That's something ... that a five-year-old might ask? But that is not anything that any grown-up that I've ever been around in my entire life would ever let pass from their lips.

Does that set the tone for today's episode of "Morning Joe"? Do you see that it wasn't just silly liberal Mika being like "I'm going to say the liberal things," then Republican Joe saying, "STOP BEING A GAYWAD, MIKA"? This was Joe Scarborough, very worried that Donald Trump is literally losing his mind.

Mika very soon chimed in:

MIKA: It's disturbing [...] What's really concerning me is that there is ... absolutely no one in the White House who can get him to stop talking. There's nobody. [...]

He's blithering right and left, and I can only imagine that his staff is sitting there with their heads in their hands.

And then:

JOE: He doesn't seem to remember what he said just five minutes ago. He doesn't know his own positions on a healthcare bill that he's passing. He seems confused.

A bit later, Joe wanted to make sure we all knew they weren't talking about how Trump is a bullshitter who is full of bullshit, but that they were for real worried about the inside of his brain:

JOE: We're not talking about whether Trump is a huckster or not, we're talking about how mentally there is a marked change in this man even in the last five years.

MIKA: Something's up.

JOE: Something's up.

Have Joe and Mika made themselves clear? Do you need them to tell you more about why they are talking about this?

Raging hack Mark Halperin kept trying to change the subject and make it all "People are concerned about this policy and that policy but I am a raging hack who has fantasies about doing sexes with Donald Trump, so I shan't say anything mean!" Joe and Mika were NOT. HAVING. IT:

MIKA: It's almost like you're pinpointing [policy issues], like, let's analyze what he said about those and be concerned on a policy level and have a conversation ... We're gonna say what maybe no one ... we'll do it again. I'm not sure he's OK. I'm not sure he's OK, and you have that feeling with people ...

JOE: Right.

MIKA: ... who are not OK, and it starts to dawn on you that they're not OK.

JOE: And it's getting worse.


In a later segment, Mika, acknowledged how she and Joe used to be SUCK-UP DOUCHE-ROCKETS (and personal advisers!) when it came to Trump, and she actually used that fact to bolster their argument, saying, "We have known this man for a very long time. This is not the same guy."

This is one case where we might truly appreciate Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski's expertise, because as they said, they've known the man for 12 years. If something's up, they'd know it, and they might be some of the only people willing to say it.

Wait, does this mean the fate of America rests in Joe and Mika's hands? Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck. FUCK!

Anyway, happy birthday, Mika! Glad to see you and Joe having good brains today.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.


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