Joe And Mika Officially Dumping Donald Trump Like The Filth He Is
HOO BOY. It's been a long time comin', from the heady days back when Joe and Mika Scarborough-Brzezinski acted as informal advisers to Donald Trump, but we think they're finally breaking up with the "president" once and for all. Seems they don't like how Trump dry-drunked himself all over Twitter on Saturday and, with no evidence besides a Breitbart post President Steve Bannon sticked under his nose, accused President Obama of ordering an illegal "wire tapp" against him.
There were many beautiful moments from today's "Morning Joe," so let's look at some together, starting with Joe and Mika saying Trump's little Twitter tantrum sealed the deal, his administration has no credibility, and BOY BYE:
JOE: What Donald Trump did on Saturday morning has shaken this government and the confidence of its people to the core. It is hard to overstate how reckless that tweet was, the 45th president of the United States accusing the 44th president of the United States of tapping his phones, personally tapping his phones, calling him sick ...
JOE: For people comparing this to the birther controversy, context is necessary. It is one thing when a reality TV star accuses a president of a sleazy conspiratorial theory. But when a president of the United States accuses another president, the context changes, and it is dangerous. [...] We are in crisis.
MIKA: Yeah. It's an administration that's lost all credibility at this point.
DANG GIRL DANG!
A bit later, Joe and Mika played a clip of White House spokesperson Sarah Huckabee Sanders, who is bad at her job, hemming and hawing to Martha Raddatz about how Trump has seen stuff (on the internet) that indicates Barack Obama did Watergate to the phones in Trump Tower, baselessly saying "IF" Obama did this, it would be a yooge fuckin' deal that needs to be investigated. Mika is NOT HAVING THAT SHIT, and neither is Joe:
MIKA: What the ... what the hell? I'm sorry ... that is just ...
JOE: How do they go out and say "IF THIS DID HAPPEN?" They might as well go out and say that "IF George W. Bush ...
MIKA: This White House is a joke.
JOE: ... helped O.J. Simpson kill Nicole Brown," that would be the biggest scandal of all time. "IF Barack Obama had something to do with JonBenet Ramsey's death," that would be the biggest political scandal of all time. I mean, "IF." ... There is no evidence ... nor will there EVER be any evidence that Barack Obama, himself, ordered the tapping of Donald Trump's phones in Trump Tower.
What about those reports that Pussgrab McWeakSad left the White House "in a rage" on Friday, and that he was GRRR MAD all weekend long? This is the part where Joe 'n' Mika call their former boyfriend Donald Trump a pussy, basically:
JOE: He was in a rage all weekend ...
MIKA: Because it was discovered that his attorney general lied?
JOE: Yeah. Because it was discovered that his attorney general lied ...
MIKA: And his little speech coverage went away?
JOE: Maybe if these people would stop lying ...
MIKA: This is a very small man.
WITH TINY BABY HANDS!
Next, here's Mika, on the verge of tears (because sometimes people cry during breakups), issuing a personal plea to Sarah Huckabee Sanders and all the other Trump bots, reminding them to think of AMERICA, and also that, in the future, when Trump is but a piss stain of a bad memory, these people will still need to be able to get jobs, and "helped Trump destroy America" really doesn't look good to prospective employers:
MIKA: I don't know how anybody can defend this president, even if it's their job. Like, you've gotta have a job AFTER this. You've gotta look in the mirror AFTER this. Sarah Huckabee, or whoever is gonna speak out next, you have to look in the mirror and think about this country, after this is over. You have to think of the endgame here, because there IS one, at the rate we're going.
Here's where Mika says maybe Trump is mentally insane, like whoa if true!
JOE: [Trump is] totally unprepared for the job of being president, and unfortunately, not knowing what he does not know.
MIKA: And possibly unfit, mentally. Sorry. I'm just saying what everyone's thinking, so.
And finally, Mika is ready to have The Conversation, the one liberals have been having since election day and before, about how maybe Trump really does want to be Hitler:
MIKA: We hear people from other countries who say, "This is how it starts." I think we're at that point where we have to have that conversation.
BRITISH MEDIA LADY JOANNA COLES: Well, I think there are a lot of people are very worried in Europe. Britain is watching this like a soap opera.
MIKA: And others are watching it with historic knowledge of how things go terribly wrong.
Oh god, it's finally happened. They sensed something was amiss when they realized what a pathological liar Kellyanne Conway is. It started really dawning on them when they saw dead-eyed Trump adviser Stephen Miller shout that everyone MUST respect the president's AUTHORI-TAH. Last week, they discovered that this ugly pock-marked thing named Steve Bannon is really running the White House. And now here they are, the same place all we smart liberals got to MONTHS AGO, figuring out that yes, all the warnings we made about how Trump is a wanna-be dictator with no respect for American institutions or the Constitution, and also is up Russia's ass in ways we don't fully understand yet, were prescient and true.
Welcome to the party, Joe and Mika! It's not a very fun party, but at least we get to say "I told you so" a whole bunch.
Like this: JESUS CHRIST, JOE AND MIKA, WE TOLD YOU SO.
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