Joe Biden, for a change, is itching to fight. Last time, Old Smokin' Joe jumped out of his Trans-Am and tried to take old man Trump behind the gym to teach him a lesson or two about grabbing ladies by the pussy. We enjoyed the hell out of that shit.
"The press always ask me, 'Don't I wish I were debating him?' No, I wish we were in high school -- I could take him behind the gym. That's what I wish," Biden said then at a campaign rally in Pennsylvania for Hillary Clinton.
His face! HAHAHAHA!
Trump was so fucking upset by the idea of catching Joe's hands, he decided he needed to play respectability politics and signal to Joe that he wasn't being very "presidential." But he didn't actually say that shit at the time, nah, he waited almost two years to make a little punk ass comeback to a blunt call out from the Scranton Scrapper. Is it any wonder Uncle Joe drinks his Mickey's silently while aiming his Eagle Eye at Old Man Trump? Is it odd he does it while silently hoping Trump "gives him a reason"? No. It's not.
Let's take a look at that killer comeback from King Trump.
"You know when he said, 'I'm going to take you behind the barn'? Oh, just trust me, I would kick his ass. He'd be easy," Trump said. "But, Joe, gimme a break. A guy who keeps making outrageous statements thinks he has a shot of being president?"
Oh NOES!!! NOT OUTRAGEOUS STATEMENTS!! HOW WOULD WE LIVE! We all know that it's impossible for an old white dude with a shithole mouth to ever get elected president. It's why President Hillary Clinton is running for re-election! What the fuck kind of drugs of delusion is this asshole smoking?
Receipts:
'Go Back to Your Country,' a Supercut of Racism Featuring Trump | NowThisyoutu.be
That brings us to today. Trump is still racist as fuck, and looking for a way to keep himself from being dragged behind the High School Gym. Now tasked with proving he is not batshit as all hell, just because he's an older white gentleman, Biden discussed what he'd do to prove he is stronger in both body and mind than President Trump.
From CNN:
Former Vice President Joe Biden joked in an interview that aired Tuesday that he would challenge President Donald Trump to a push-up contest if the President attacked his age or mental health.
"I would say, 'Come on Donald, come on man. How many push-ups do you want to do here, pal?' Jokingly," Biden said in an interview with MSNBC. "You know, come on, run with me man."
LOLOLOL! Push-ups, hahahahaha! "Jokingly," he added, because ... ??? Having failed for several years to engage Trump in a friendly fisticuffs match, Biden cleverly suggests "feats of strength" and lets the chips fall where they may. Will Trump take two years to respond? Probably. Joe said "run" and we all know Trump cannot "walk" properly since even the Queen of England had to teach him how, and how he didn't even TRY to walk in Italy at the G-7.
For some reason, Joe just doesn't seem afraid of Donald in any way, shape, or form.
"The idea that I'd be intimidated by Donald Trump," Biden said with a look that suggested that notion would be foolish. "He's the bully that I knew my whole life. He's the bully that I've always stood up to. He's the bully that used to make fun when I was a kid that I stutter, and I'd smack him in the mouth."
But while he may not fear Trump AT ALL, there is one TINY person that he surprisingly seems to be renting free headspace to, and it's kind of obvious she scares Joe just a little bit.
"It's very different than turning to someone on a stage who says something that's so off the wall to me because I don't want to attack anyone on stage, that's not what I intend to do," Biden said. "But I realize that some have concluded that because I didn't respond very tough back to [Kamala Harris] that how can I take on Trump? I've never had any trouble taking anyone on from Trump to Putin to Xi Jinping himself."
So, basically, Joe can beat up all the assholes in the entire world, but he wasn't prepared for a five-foot-two Black-Indian Lady Senator from California to step to him, and question his record. Poor Joe seems to have caught her hands, and no, he will never ever get over it. The moral of this story is, no matter how much machismo is flowing in the dick measuring contest, when Momala shows up, the fucking party ends. Love y'all!
[CNN]
Wonkette is ad-free and funded ONLY by YOU. Shoot us some dough, if you are able!
