Donate

Joe Miller Still Whining About That Election He Lost 1,000 Years Ago

News
    For the love of Joseph and Mary's unsullied maidenhead: When will Joe Miller stop smelling his own farts and accept the fact that he is a loser? "Probably never," according to everyone. "He's a hopeless dick." Miller is still peddling the same sad legal argument -- "voter intent" is in violation of what Joe Miller intended, or something -- in hopes that he will be vindicated and Lisa Murkowski will be arrested for massive voter fraud. This is Joe Miller's wettest dream, and he will describe it to the Alaska Supreme Court this afternoon. Will voter intent prevail over Joe Miller's perverted sense of Democracy? Alaska's smug Assistant Attorney General points out that it's "hard to imagine how a voter who wrote 'Lisa Murcowsky' or even 'Leeza Murcowski' might have been trying to vote for anyone else." Yes, hard to imagine if you're not a bearded megalomaniac. [ADN]


  • More than thirty thousand people have died since the start of Mexico's War on Drugs. [CNN]

  • An enormous loaded gun passed through a TSA porno checkpoint undetected and without any problems whatsoever! And now a similar kind of Diligent Security is being introduced to the DC Metro. [ABC]

$
Donate with CC

Even Dinsdale was frightened of Doug ... He used sarcasm. He knew all the tricks: dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

Yr Wonkette is no stranger to the double-edged weapon of sarcasm, we'll admit. OR WILL WE? It's part of our postmodern toolkit, with which we seek to undermine patriotism, faith, the free market, the family, and ultimately America itself. Duh. But we would never be so naive as to think we have a monopoly on irony and sarcasm, oh no, far from it. This week, we dip into the sludge of deletia for some brilliant examples of cutting rightwing wit turned back on us, with devastating results. Hope you're not all TRIGGERED so much you have to go find a SAFE SPACE, libs!

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC

This weekend, hundreds of people are gathering in Denver, Colorado for the 2018 Flat Earth Conference -- two whole days of people with suspiciously Andy Warhol-like hair yelling "Where's the curve?!?" and talking about ice walls -- and we are missing out! Flat earthers are kind of the best of all conspiracy theorists, because aside from a few fascists and anti-Semites in the mix, they are mostly harmless cranks who just want to feel like they are way smarter than all of the scientists. As far as I know, believing in a Flat Earth, while stupid, has never hurt anyone -- which is honestly kind of refreshing these days!

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC
Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Newsletter

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc