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Joe Miller Still Whining About That Election He Lost 1,000 Years Ago

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    For the love of Joseph and Mary's unsullied maidenhead: When will Joe Miller stop smelling his own farts and accept the fact that he is a loser? "Probably never," according to everyone. "He's a hopeless dick." Miller is still peddling the same sad legal argument -- "voter intent" is in violation of what Joe Miller intended, or something -- in hopes that he will be vindicated and Lisa Murkowski will be arrested for massive voter fraud. This is Joe Miller's wettest dream, and he will describe it to the Alaska Supreme Court this afternoon. Will voter intent prevail over Joe Miller's perverted sense of Democracy? Alaska's smug Assistant Attorney General points out that it's "hard to imagine how a voter who wrote 'Lisa Murcowsky' or even 'Leeza Murcowski' might have been trying to vote for anyone else." Yes, hard to imagine if you're not a bearded megalomaniac. [ADN]


  • More than thirty thousand people have died since the start of Mexico's War on Drugs. [CNN]

  • An enormous loaded gun passed through a TSA porno checkpoint undetected and without any problems whatsoever! And now a similar kind of Diligent Security is being introduced to the DC Metro. [ABC]

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Lace up your sneakers, Wonkers! Time to hit the streets. MoveOn, the ACLU, MomsRising and all your favorite dirty leftists are getting together for a yuuuuuuuuge march to show that WE ARE A NATION OF DECENT FUCKING HUMAN BEINGS WHO DON'T KIDNAP BABIES. And your Wonkette will be there!

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Rudy Giuliani, flapping his loose yap to Politico on Monday:

President Donald Trump's attorney Rudy Giuliani said on Monday that he was actually just bluffing last week when he called for Justice Department leaders to suspend special counsel Robert Mueller's investigation within 24 hours.

"I didn't think it would," Giuliani told POLITICO with a laugh when asked about the Mueller inquiry's still being very much an active investigation. "But I still think it should be." [...]

That's what I'm supposed to do," Giuliani explained on Monday. "What am I supposed to say? That they should investigate him forever? Sorry, I'm not a sucker."

Cool, that is just Rudy Giuliani admitting he's full of shit and words and more shit and more words (and also a noun, a verb and 9/11). We are guessing therefore that Giuliani, who is a lawyer, would legally advise us to continue assuming we should take his every oral ejaculation with a gi-normous grain of FULL OF SHIT.

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